When is a door not a door? When it is ajar.

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Did you hear about the comedian cereal killer?...He raped his victims before strangling them to death.

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What looks like half a loaf of bread. The other half

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Knock knock. Whos there? The police, your wife is dead. The police, your wife is dead who? Sir, this isn't a joke.

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Why did the Salesman leave the leper colony? He had to wish his daughter a happy birthday.

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WHY IS THIS SENTENCE CAPITALIZED? BECAUSE CAPS LOCK IS ON.

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What's brown and adhesive? A stick

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Fight fire with with fire! That would be impossible, it'd just make the fire bigger. And probably kill you.

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what lies in ore an develops a golden tan ken bigleys body

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What did the rat say to the dog? Nothing, he is a rat and therefore incapable of speech.

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What did the hooker say to the black guy? How long do you want it for?

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Why did Rudolph poop while flying over Chicago? Actually, he had to go since trip started, and that's just where it happened to land.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To cause global mayhem.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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What's the easiest way to make new friends? With Play-Doh.

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What do you call a gay man? Phil Krahn

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Q. How many grains of rice can you fit in an egg? A. Fire extinguisher.

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5 Italian guys from Long Island

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken can only be speculated.

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What happens when you put the batteries in BACKWARDS in the Energizer Bunny? Nothing. Nothing happens when you insert batteries backwards

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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Found out the difference between onions and men. I don't cry when I'm chopping up men.

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If a brick said "hi" what you reply with? Nothing. You can't reply to something that doesn't speak.

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Q.why'd the monkey fall out of the tree A. because he was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops