A: "Knock knock." B: "Who's there?" A: "John Doe." B: "John Doe who?" A: "..."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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Why did Billy drop his ice cream? The Holocaust.

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Why is that man such a perv? I don't know. Ever since I let him see my boobs, he has had this undying obsession with sex. So, I guess that, as society would classify him, he is a sex addict. He will do anything for it, even if he needs a man to get it. I feel terrible about starting his obsession, and plan to take him to therapy next week for the sake of his health.

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What are the two sexiest farm animals? Consider that we are humans we shouldn't find any sex appeal in animals but if i had to guess I would say Brown Chicka Brown Cow

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A mosquito flies into a bar and orders a bloody mary, the bartender then takes out a swatter and kills the pest. Noticing the event, the patrons cheer and continued drinking their frothy beverage. Minutes later, the phone rings and the bartender answers the phone. "Hello?" "Hi, I'm looking for a friend of mine, is he there?" "Let me check, by the way, what's his name?" "Jack Hoff" "One sec. HEY FELLAS(yelling over the noisy bar), IS THERE A JACK HOFF HERE? I NEED A JACK HOFF! ANYONE?" Mr. Hoff, sitting at the bar hears this and asks, "who is it?" "He said he's a friend of yours!" "Which one?" " He said his name's Dick Stroker and he needs help on something hardhe'll meet you around back." "Oh ok, thanks."

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9 Cats on a boat. One Jumped off, how many left? 8.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a Buddhist monk walk into a bar. A heated religious debate ensues in which everyone is uncomfortable and leaves questioning their own faith and fearing the unknown.

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What did the wall say to the other wall? I didn't say anything because it isn't living and it can't talk because it is impossible.

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A blackman and an asian are walking down the street they pass eachother exchange looks and continue on with their day

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Guy 1: "Smells like UpDog in here." Guy 2: "No it doesnt.."

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Why was the Jew evicted from his home? He forgot to pay the rent

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2 Scientists walk into a bar. The first one asks for H20, and the second one asks for H20 too. They both enjoy a refreshing glass of water.

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Your mom is so fat... That you inherited type one diabetes.

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So, a man walks into a bar. His alcoholic habits are slowly tearing apart his marriage.

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Why did the turkey cross the road? His friend, the chicken, had just been hit by a passing car.

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Why did the black guy punch the white guy? They were both professional boxers.

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And so the Lord said unto John "Come forth and receive eternal life," but John came fifth, and won a toaster instead.

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Whats the difference between a loser and a winner there places

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joke hahhahahah where did u find that joke, on the internet

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What did the Cat get for Christmas? Nothing cats don't celebrate Christmas

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What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? Both your parents are dead John.

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Q: Why did the black man win the 100 meter dash? A: Because ever since he heard of this event, he has spent weeks preparing for it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops