So a blonde, brunete, and red head are all on the side of the road for prostitution. so a man walks up to the red head with money. she takes it and runs off. a man goes up to the bruenete and hands her money, but she also takes it and runs. so a man walks up to the blond with money and she says "wait...we get paid to do this?"

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What's the difference between an elephant and a grape? They're both fruit. Except the elephant.

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What's the difference between a guy who sees the glass half empty and a guy who sees the glass half full? The first guy is happier because his tables tip more than the second guy's.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven

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What is human, went bankrupt eight times, got a small loan of a million dollars, and is over all a terrible person? Your probably thinking Donald Trump Well your correct.

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When Chuck Norris dives into a pool... he gets wet due to the aqueous nature of the water

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A boy grows up loving tractors. For birthday and Christmas each year he got a tractor toy of some kind, until the age of 17, when he finally gave up tractors and got himself a CD player. One day, listening to all the latest tunes with some headphones, he looks outside to see his neighbour's house on fire. He goes outside to find firemen trying to put out the blaze. He jumps into the blazing house and inhales as much as he can, which astonishingly puts out the blaze. A fireman confusing asked "How did you do that?" The boy replies, " I'm an ex-tractor fan."

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How many people does it take to make a fun party? Idk, that's why I asked you, you see I'm throwing a party and wantedto know how many people I should invite.

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Yo mama so fat when she looked at the scale it said to be continued

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what do you call a mexican whos lost his car? nothing, nick ate him

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Why doesnt mexico have an olympic team? Because everyone who can run, jump, or swim in already in america.

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Justin Bieber hits puberty

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Why did the boy throw the clock out of the window? Because it was broken.

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Whats long,hard, and has c.u.m in ig? Cucumber....also my wiener

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If an ugly person got raped. What would that be called? Nothing. It is never gonna happen. Kelvin Yang.

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What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

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That's illegal What? Your mom

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Whats blind and deaf? Hellen Keller.

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Q: What kind of time is it when you fall from a ladder and are moments from landing straight on a operational circle saw? Moral: ITS TIME TO SPLIT!

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my throat Really started to hurt, like reallly badly, and i remember On sponge bob, he laughed so much his laugh box broke. well, my throat really hurts. please help! can i get my laugh box back? will i never be able to laugh again and have to get it replaced like squidward did?!!? please answer, i have a friend who would probably give me part of her laugh box, but she Laughs like a hyena

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What did the black guy say to you when you took his fried chicken Give me back my chicken

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What did the boy say when he could'nt find his dog? I wonder where Spot went.

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speak now or forever hold your pee

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Rubies are red Some diamonds are blue I have candy so get in my car

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops