What did the disabled child say when I hit him with my car? *thunk*

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A Dog walks into a bar to order a drink. The bar patrons are at first amused and overjoyed to share their night with a playful pet, until they see that his mouth is foaming and he's already started trying to eat the nearest child. Screams erupt as the bartender calls 911. The dog manages to injure two patrons before he is tazed by the police and taken to be put down. One of the men injured has to have his arm amputated, which is unfortunate for his new career as a heart surgeon. The hospital informs him that they have no choice but to force him to resign, after they hand him his lengthy medical bill. He ends up losing his apartment, and his fiance leaves him for someone more stable financially. The man then drinks himself to death, after attacking and killing a local dog with his one remaining hand. The dog belonged to a new family on the block, whose son had terminal cancer. Due to the cancer, the boy had trouble making friends in a new area, and the dog (Sonny) was his one source of companionship and, by extension, hope. The boy is later admitted to the hospital for breathing problems, and after a 4-hour surgery, is pronounced dead. His attending physician was quoted as saying "He was so close to beating back the infection, but all of a sudden it seemed like he just... gave up." I mean, how was a dog supposed to order a drink in the first place, am I right?

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never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down

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A Jewish person was found dead in an alley way last night, Hitler did nothing wrong.

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What's do you call two bulls, a goat, and a horse? Farm A nimals

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What's worse than getting AIDS from your boyfriend? Getting AIDS from your brother.

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what's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? when you slap a mosquito it stops sucking:)

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What did the girl get for her birthday? the Plan B pill

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She had no arms.

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"Aids" "What?" "Yup, you just got aids­­­."

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No soap radio

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Q: What's worse than tripping down the stairs in front of a crowd of people? A: The bombing of Hiroshima

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Your moms so old. She might die soon

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What has four legs, but cannot walk? A giraffe with polio.

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a black guy hates chicken.

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A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. I just bought a new xbox.

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Q: What did the homless man get for chritsmas? A: Frostbite

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What did the blind quadriplegic get for Christmas? Cancer.

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President Donald Trump

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a tiger swims into the indian ocen and eats a tuna. the tiger shortly dies

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A guy walks into a Bar ........ OUCH

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What do you get when you cross a Lion and a Shark? You would likely get trouble, seeing as its both animals are quite dangerous and crossing even one of them is ill advised.

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What did Mitch say to joe when he saw his fly was down? Nothing because he's a bagle

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Screw it you write the joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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