A teacher, a consturction worker, and an army general are on an airplane. The pilot tells them the plane has too much weight, and if they don't each drop one item then the plane will crash. Realizing one item each is obviously not enough weight to throw off, the teacher and the construction worker team up and throw the army genral off the plane. They land safely, and live the rest of their life haunted by their vile actions.

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we asked cheryl cole what she would do if it was the last day on earth she replied.. id probably spend all the time with my family. wrong cheryl youd spend your last day on earth running away from other people wanting to accomplish their last day on earth dreams

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Why did the chicken cross the road---- because he's having financial and relationship related problems that make his life so hideously unbearable that he wants to kill himself and because he's a chicken and cannot overdose or hang himself he goes for the most viable option as to run across a busy street in hopes of getting smashed to oblivion by a car

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One day in school two kids had a conversation. Susan: What do you want to do when your older? Oliver: I want to go to the moon. Susan: Oh. I went there last week. Oliver: Can you smell something. Susan: Haven't you ever been to Pennsylvania.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Refrigerator

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roses are red violets are blue your friend is a scumbag and so are you

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Why doesn't Michael sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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If a Cheetah and Usain bolt raced in the Olympics who would win? Obviously Usain hes black and cheetahs can't perform in the olympics

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Roses are red, Because they can intrinsically change color through natural dyes.

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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There are two cows in a field. One cow says to the other - 'Are you afraid of the mad cow disease?' The other cow says - 'No, cuz I'm a duck.'

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Why did the chicken cross the street? I don't know really

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What is E.T. short For? So he can fit on ship

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What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, and only one eye? Dave.

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why does beyonce sing " to the left, to the left"? - cause black people have no rights

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What made the old man laugh? A pile of dead babies.

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Why doesn't the boy get anything for Christmas? His parents died the night before!

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Roses are Red Violets are Purple But nothing rhymes with purple.

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Your mom is so poor that her boobs are real.

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What do you call a lubia chin jew slave?

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Who is the most vile man in Britain? Jerry Carr, the guy who works at the casino.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm drunk, I want Taco Bell.

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Why did the Jew hate bananas? He was deathly allergic to them.

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What is the name of the mermaid on the Starbucks logo? No one knows, she ran away many years ago of shame. It's undiscovered why.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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