What happened when the child missed his school bus home? He had to take the long 6 mile walk back home and did not return until dinner time.

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What do you call a black man who is great at basketball? An all-star

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this joke is funny so dont read the rest even though there is no rest

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what does wtf stand for? what? i was asking you!

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What did Heinrich Himmler say to the chicken? I'll take that liver thanks.

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Person 1: Why don't you want to date me? Person 2: Because you are ugly Person 1: Why am I ugly? Person 2: Because you have bad features. Person 1: Why do i have bad features? Person 2: It's your genetics. Person 1: Why is it my genetics Person 2: Cuz that's the way god made you Person 1: Why? Person 2: Because god's god made you Person 1: Why Person 2: Because the god of god of god made you Person 1: Why? Person 2: That's the way the god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of (GOES ON FOREVER!!!) made you.

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What's worse than finding your cat dead? Finding your cat dead because it choked on your goldfish.

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Why do women fake orgasms? Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.

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What would a prostitute do if she was given a million dollars? She would probably diversify her portfolio. First, she would pay her rent. She would buy some groceries and a present for her mother. She would then invest it in stocks and low-yield bonds. She would they buy a vehicle. This win might not affect her continuance in her job.

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Two fish are in a tank. One asks the other, "How do you drive this thing?"

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A man sees another man sitting on a bench with a pickle in his ear. He asks the man "Why do you have a pickle in your ear?" The other man replies "What? I couldn't hear you because I have a pickle in my ear."

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Just found out that it doesn't work.

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What did Batman say to Robin after they got on the bus? We should have taken the batmobile.

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What's the worst joke ever? Justin Bieber.

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, grass is green, sky is blue, dirt is brown, fire is orange, water is transparent, powder is white

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What does a black man do in the bathroom? He Dookies on bobby

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What's more greasy than grease? Kevin's hair

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A man recently set the world record for jumping into a foot of water from 50 feet high. Luckily, this made the clean-up rather simple.

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I like my women like I like my coffee, a brewed beverage prepared from the roasted seeds of an evergreen shrub of the genus Coffea.

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Q: When do you know you've had to much to drink? A: When the zebra in your belly button starts talking to you

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BOB:john John:what? BOB:4:59 seconds to get rid of it

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rofl lol, the joke below me has made my computer offer to translate this page. It thinks it's in Spanish

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When faced with an impossible question. I like to give, and maybe receive, an impossible, yet endearing, request/answer to the problem. Sex?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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