chuck norris was bit by a snake, a few hours later he died

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What's worse than an ice cream cone falling over? The Holocaust. What's worse than that? Two ice cream cones falling over.

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In Soviet Russia, the political system was very different than it is today.

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How do u turn on a lamp? Flip the switch

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Women's Rights

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A duck walks into a bar. The duck walks over to the bartender and orders a beer. "put it on my bill." he says. The bartender angrily grabs the duck and kicks him out of the bar, because the duck has done this many times, but has never once paid his bill to the bar. The duck is an alcoholic and is slowly ruining his relationship with his family.

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Knock Knock. In about 10 seconds you'll be trespassing on my property, I suggest you leave immediately. Your suppose to say who's there.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Silence. Silence who? No, I meant there was silence, I didn't really say anything. Oh, OK. But seriously, who's there?

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Why did the chicken invent a memory ereaser machine? So he could erease everyone's memory so they would stop making chicken jokes

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why do fat people eat so much? who cares

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What kind of cheese isn't yours Nacho Cheese actually it depends on the type of cheese that you stole due to your kleptomania

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[Insert dumb, last minute anti-joke here]

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What did the hispanic say to the black guy? I'm not sure. I wasn't listening because eavesdropping is rude.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to its dying chicks who were just run over.

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A: Knock Knock! B: RING THE DOORBELL YA DUMMY

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Man 1: Is your refrigerator running? Man 2: Nope, broke last week.

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why did Rebecca black get down on Fridays? because she had school every other day of the week.

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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What do you give a man who has everything? Syphilis

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was stapeled on to the elephant.

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Why did the boy engage in oral sex with the other boy. He was a hormonal homosexual.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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Why did the old man miss the Alzheimer's Day walk? Because he died in his sleep.

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What do you call flashlight in an Asian kids room what ever the brand is

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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