Why didn't the Irishman walk into the bar? Beacause he had killed himself the previous night as a result of his alcoholism.

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why was the man scared of the tree because it was shady

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What did the facial stylist charge Jack Sparrow to get his ears pierced? A buc-an-ear!

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Knock Knock Who's there? A Crazy Rhinoceros

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the user is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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Why did the scarecrow get promoted? He was outstanding in his field

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>>---------------------------------[ knee ]------------------------->>>

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Have a nice day! Dont tell me what to do.

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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Why did the Zombie kill and eat a man? Because it was hungry.

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what do you get when you combine a vampire,werewolf,and whiny girlfriend ....... the worst show in the history of the earth

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How do you know if you have a good slave? It is hard working and determined... And black

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Why are there so many anti-jokes about refrigerators? Because the writer of the joke was pressured by terrorists that would kill him if he didn't write about refrigerators.

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What did Dave tell me on Tuesday? "It's Wednesday, dumbass."

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What did the cow say to the chicken crossing the road? Moo

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A black man "walks into" a club. Several minutes later he is dead. The police, in a later press conference, refuse to admit that the club ever left the officer's belt.

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How does a bird grow gills if you're riding a peanut. A fridge.

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Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

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Why did the boy fall over? Because he broke his leg. Why did the second boy fall over? Because he was having a seizure.

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Whats worse then 15 missed calls from your mom?, The Holocaust

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Why did susie fall off the swing? Because an arrow penetrated her head.

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there are 2 muffins in an oven one says "man its hot in here" the other says "shut up i hate this joke"

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What do you call a man sitting at the bar drinking alone? An alcoholic.

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What kind of bee's make milk? Booobies!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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