Knock, knock. Whose there? Me. Leave.

There was a guy and a girl naked in bed, sleeping together. When they woke up they didn't remember the last 72 hours and wanted some questions answered, including Where am I? Who are you? What year is it? What's my name?

Your mom is not fat!

What did the cow do when it got run over by a tractor? It died.

So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

YOU

There once was a man named Trevor. Trevor was walking casually through the forest one day. All of a sudden, a wolf leapt out from the trees. The wolf said, in a harsh voice, "Hey man! This is my patch". But then Trevor woke up and realised that his hallucinations were symptoms of a degenerative brain disease.

A disabled man walked into a- That can't be right

Why didn't the boy get his mom anything for her birthday? He was killed by a drunk driver years ago

What do you call a homosexual in a wheelchair? A cripple

Why did the road cross the chicken? The 2 nouns in the sentence has been switched.

What do you call a guy walking into a bar Dave, because that's his name

Why did the koala fall of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the other koala fall off the tree? It was stapled to the first koala.

Why couldn't Billy the bird fly? He was an ostrich, ostriches can't fly.

a horse walkes into a bar... never mind that's just Sarah Jessica Parker

what did the African kid get for his birthday AIDS

"Solids tunderf" he said, while chewing his gum.

Knock knock Who's there? The chicken that crossed the road

When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

Your momas so fat her doctor put her on a diet plan.

why did the black man apply for a job at kfc? His family was in debt after the loss of his father.

How do you make an elf sad? Murder his family.

How many lawyers does it take to screw in a lightbulb One because lawyers are usually well educated and know how to screw in a lightbulb

An elderly man farts during Sunday morning mass. The children around him laugh and then their parents remind them to be respectful.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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