If Life Throws You Melons, Then You're Probably Dyslexic. -S.H.A.T Brother 2Flush

What's the difference between ?2 and and 74^3? ?-405242.585786

Hickory Dickory Dock, your mother is a whore

Whats black and yellow and makes you laugh? A bus full of niggers driving of a cliff

Why did the polar bear die? Global warming.

A mormon walked into a bar and realised it was a bar the he leaves

What do you call the branch of Science that separates the organism's race? RACISM

What do you do when your dish washer breaks? divorce her.

what is juicy and smells like juice,but it is not juice? juice. i lied about it not being juice.

Why didn't Suzie go to the park? She commited suicide 2 years ago.

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. -It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Its children were just slaughtered.

AHLTFKCITAWKSHTC

If Timmy has 2 apples and Sarah has 7 apples, what is the square root of the distance of Mars and Jupiter divided by the speed of light if X equals the value of negative infinity given the equation X(2) - E=MC/7?

Roses are red, VIolets are blue, Tulips are white, Sunflowers are yellow

What do you call a man with no arms? A: A Man with no arms.

What happens when you spend far too much money in a gambling machine during a solar eclipse on a leap year? You get poor.

What does it mean when you see a bunch of blacks running in one direction? That you need to be more specific.

Friends are like potatoes. I don't have any potatoes.

Guy 1: why are you being such a douche? Guy 2: cause douches get the most pussy

Girl you must be Jamaican...because you're black and annoying.

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(To the tune of Perry the Platypus) He's a completely retarded Allosaurus of action! A purple dopey dimwit who always giggles away! He never does anything But children's songs he does sing And the little kids squeal whenever they hear him say... *i love you, you love me* He's Barney! Barney the Dinosaur!

I Raped And Killed A Little Girl Called Zoe. It All Started When I Raped A Girl In Her School, I Always Waited Outside Of Her School in my white van, one day the girl I raped before Zoe confronted me in my white van, I asked her if she wanted to see my puppies in the back of the van, she said yes, I locked her in there, I kidnapped her. The next day that girl Mysteriously Died. Iwonder how? Tee hee hee... The next day Zoe came up to my van, She also said yes about the puppies too! I kidnapped her and raped her. The next day I was rushed to hospital, I was revealed by the doctor I Had Been Diagnosed With HIV, I knew it was from her because she is the only girl I'd raped, So I walked home. When I Was Walking Home, I Was Thinking About How Angry I Was With That Lil' Bitch; I Was Thinking of ways to kill her, when I got home I heard her listen to; Bang Bang~ By Ariana Grande, Nikki Minaj And Jessie J. That Got Me thinking, Ah, that's how I am going to kill her. So I opened my cage and Got my gun out; I killed her. Blood Was Dripping Down from her head, I Grabbed the corpse and put It in my basement, after that I started licking her fanny, Drinking Her pussy juice. Then I drained all of her Blood out of her body and bottled it. After all the draining I had 600,000 Bottles. I Drunk one of them. and may I just say: it was delicious! After that, I went online and sold all the bottles to I.Am.A.Vampire.Com For £1million Pounds!! Man is now mega rich and I brought a slut and fucked her. I Now lift a fucking amazing life because of a vulnerable, Dumb Ass girl called Zoe. Thank you!!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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