A piece of wood walks into a bonfire. Wood can't walk.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the penis say to the vagina during intercourse? It didnt say anything, the male said to the female "i like pickles."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Yo mama has had so many kidney stones she has to be on a water diet.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the boy stop working on a farm? His country became more economically developed.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

your momma eats so much ice cream, you often find yourself without anything sweet to eat late at night when you're hungry

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What is the difference between a bitch and your ex-girlfriend? First of all, they are two different types of mammals. Second, dogs don't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a frog with a bow tie? Cute!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is to sparsely populated and not economically viable.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How many women does it take to unscrew a light bulb? Usually just one, and a ladder.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How did the conductor survive the Electric Chair? - He was a bad conducter

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What happens when you run over a mexican? The country gets one less illegal immigrant.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How do get a baby to stop crawling in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

where do you hide a black mans paycheck? somewhere he would never find it

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why is it a shame if a kid gets run over by a car? I like the newspaper headlines about stabbings better.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

a man walks off of a damn. a damn is not a noun, thus nobody can walk off it

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Person 1: I got a really good knock, knock joke. Person 2: Okay. Person 1: You start. Person 2: Knock, knock. Person 1: Who's there? Person 2: ...

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you get when you put a pig in an oven? A dead pig.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monekey fall out of the tree? It thought it was a game. Why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? It had no arms. Why did the girl fall of of her bike? She was hit by three monkeys and a refridgerator

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Whats the difference between a bench and a black man? A bench is an inanimate object incapable of speech, emotion, or thought process.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Dusters blow stuff.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What the difference between a mexican family and a bench? The bench can support the family

thumb_up thumb_down +2

When life gives you lemons you squirt them in someones eyes and steal what life gave them.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN cil you have such a dirty mind

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Yo mama's so fat that she needs substantially larger clothes than most other people

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops