Why was it really gross when the blonde dove into the swimming pool? Because the swimming pool was full of phlegm!

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Where do you find a quadriplegic? Where you left him

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead are best friends and go shopping together.

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Penis chickens

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How did Helen Keller's Parents punished her? The put a doorknob on her door.

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What is blue and angry? Mr Johnston wearing his green dress. I'm colour blind but he came round to my way of thinking in the end.

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Why did the sperm swim back? cos he realised that he was in someones anus!

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I dream of a world where chickens can cross the road and not have their motives questioned.

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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Roses are red Violets are blue Its 2 in the morning Go the f+%& to sleep.

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knowone loved me why???????????????????????? because they were so damm ugly

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Why did the hipster get burned? Because he was a volunteer fireman.

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You heard now that you can not only bet safe at net casinos, but also win safely? Win safely? The hell does that mean? You mean you could win unsafely before? Like the betting casino crashing after you win a million? Moral: That crap is even less moral than I am ffs! Now they give you like 5000 game bucks free just to get you addicted.

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What do you call the branch of Science that separates the organism's race? RACISM

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What happens when you agree to disagree? You extend the duration of the argument.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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What did the Liver say to the Heart? Nothing, Organs can't talk

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What did the man say to his doctor?

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What would Muhammed do?

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What did the chair say to the guy? Nothing, as it is a chair and chairs can't talk

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YOOO MOMMA LIKE A BIG MAC FAT JUICE AND ONLY WORTH A BUCK!!!!

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Q: How can you tell when your selling a Blondel a microwave A: she will keep asking how many chandler the Tv gets

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Hi, this is Luke. Luke, I am your father. I burned my father's body after he died saving my life on a large space station. You're not my father, stop calling.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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