A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

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What do you call a Knight who farts a lot? Sir Farts-a-lot

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs water skiing? An anchor

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knock knock whose there? you have AIDS

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If the joke below mine says something about a mom its from adam he sucks ...

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally, she has no arms.

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What kind of people have fat lips? People who have gotten punched in the lip or have suffered a serious lip injury that has caused their lips to swell up.

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Why don't sharks attack lawyers? Professional Courtesy

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Yo mama's so fat that after her enima, she looked skinny and rather nice

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Your mama's so stupid that i wouldn't be surprised if you were to tell me that she didn't graduate high school.

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Do you know why i dont write poems Because i thought that violets were violets OTARTS...WAS...HERE

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What do you call the child of a black male and an asian female? A child of mixed ethnicities.

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So three philosophers walk into a bar. Is it necessarily the case that they walk into a bar?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like cows, Cows are cool

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Have you heard that joke about Helen Keller? No. Neither has she.

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You read this in school as a crowd of kids stand behind you laughing at your screen

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Yo mamma so black, she uses armor all instead of lotion...

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A beautoful poem: Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun! gimme all your money!

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Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

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When life gives you melons. You're not dyslexic because you can probably tell the difference between a lemon and melon because they look so different.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Tourette's, PENIS.

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Why did the math student refuse to do his geometry homework? Straight lines do not exist, so there is no real world application to any geometric shape.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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Whats green and smells like grass? Grass scented air freshener, in a green colored can.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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