What did the alcoholic say to the blind man? Nothing. But he beat his wife and kids savagely.

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roses are red violets are blue your friend is a scumbag and so are you

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Your moms so stupid that she called me to get my number

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Little Jack Horner sat in a corner eating a Christmas pie. He died the next morning because it was Easter and the pie had remained unrefrigerated since the holidays. His parents were brought up on charges of neglegent homocide. Plus, they had a meth lab in the guest bathroom and ran a prostituion ring off of Craig's list. Jack's sister is now in the care of loving foster parents,who plan on adopting her and she misses her brother. Easter is a sad reminder of her former life, even though she is now a devout Christian and acknowledges the day as that of our Lord's ressurection. She plans on going to college to study nursing, someday.

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There were 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They all had different colors of hair because hair color varies depending on genetics.

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Friends are like potatoes. I don't have any potatoes.

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Go online. why? To get a quote. why? To save money. why? Because we said so! Parenting can be hard. See how easy it is to save with GEICO.

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Why couldn't the blonde get pregnant? Because she was dead, and her reproductive organs had stopped functioning.

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Why was i said when 4 black people in a cadillac fell over a cliff. The car blew up...

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A stripper walks into a bar. She works there.

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Decode this; Hetay owcay aidsay oomay. Answer: ummmmm.... Let me think....ummm, does anybody speak pig latin?

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A man walks into a bar He goes to drink away the fact that alcoholism is tearing his family apart and that he lost custody of his three-year-old son that same day

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what does a beer and a priest have in common? They both are cold refreshing beverages, except for the priest.

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WHAT DYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE MEAN YE DON'T KNOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW?

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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An man walked into a bar. Unbeknownst to him, the bar happened to be a having a Rave party. The man, having epilepsy, proceeded to have a seizure. Luckily, a paramedic was there and saved his life.

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why did the boy die he had a raging case of cardiovascular disease

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light bulb? Only one and it is politically incorrect to assume otherwise.

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What did the comedian say when he fell off the cliff? Nothing; dead beings are incapable of performing actions.

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I think my son might be gay. He's started to listen to Justin Bieber, and last week I walked in on him engaging in penetrative anal sex with one of his friends.

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What to you call a heavy person, Someone overweight

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edmond alward. handyman services. call 0858430803.

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oh no a butt!!!!!!!!!! your stubid oh wait your right ahhhhhhhhhh

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Why did the man with brain cancer die? He drove his Segway off a cliff.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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