Q: What do you call a Polish astronomer? A: Copernicus.

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What day is it? Asked the man with a gun who dislikes music. Friday. Mostly because yesterday was thursday and tomorrow is Saturday. Sunday comes afterwards also. The man says "oh. I thought it was Tuesday."

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A German challenged an Englishman to a duel But their neigbours found out and alerted the police

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what does a deer and grass have in common? they are both green but i lied about the deer

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Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens, this is probably similar to other countries in similar situations such as middle eastern, eastern european, and latin and south america. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

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What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? Get on the ship.

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What do you say to a girl with two black eyes? Nothing you've already told her twice.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Very, very hungry.

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A: Whats black and hangs from my tree in my backyard? B: What? A: Blackberries B: Blackberries grow on bushes

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What did the teacher say to the boy whose dog had just died? Haha, your dog just died.

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When Chuck Norris realized that there was a more superior being than himself. What did he say? Suck it Safka

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What did the west African get for his birthday? Ebola

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Q: what comes after 69? A: 70

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ohai. whutz en ahntei johk? sownz soopihd.

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A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

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Why did the girl gO shopping?! Because she got paid and wanted to blow(;

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Why are black people so good at basketball? they can SHOOT, STEAL and RUN.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? because she's a woman

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Roses are red Violets are blue Peas are green Plums are purple Thieves are black

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how did the fat man survive the plane crash? he didn't, he died like everyone else.

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whats not funny and has access to a computer and reasonable internet? Me

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What's the difference between Elisabeth Fritzl and Pope John Paul II? Pope John Paul II wasn't imprisoned and raped continuously over a 24 year period in a horrific act of cruelty by his father

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what is the difference between Rick Perry and Lindsay Lohan? it only takes Lindsay 4 1/2 hours to finish a sentance.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I eat mop. I eat mop who? (I eat ma poo) Haha. ~Ali M.~

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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