What do you call a man covered in bees? Nothing, you'll startle the bees!

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What did tarzan say when he saw 100 elephants coming over the hill? Look there's 100 elephants coming over the hill What did tarzan say when he saw 100 elephants coming over the hill with sunglasses on? Nothing he did not recognize them

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Why was the little boy nervous about playing with the little girl? Because she had gonorrhea.

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How is a hamster like a cigarette? They are harmless until you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person if the Jewish religion and a pizza is a type of food.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He saw a bottle of Faygo on the other side.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Women's rights

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Why did the horse stop runnIng? His master beat him to death.

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Why was the boy with no arms and legs crying? He had a lit match in his anus.

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What's better than fornicating two 4 year old twins? Killing their parents in front of them before you do.

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A skeleton walks into a bar. He orders a beer and a mop.

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what happens when you piss on a dead monkey nothing you just lose the urge to pee O.o

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Why did the farmer name his pig "ink"? He had a terrible case of dementia.

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Why did the poorly educated man get fired from the M&M factory? He changed the M's to W's!

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What is the difference between a baby and a tree? Its not illegal to hit one with an axe

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A hipster walks into a bar you've never heard of...

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What do you call the guy who made this page. Answer: A sucker mouth bitch.

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What did the man say to the tree? Nothing, he was a mime.

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Why was the blonde staring at a container of orange juice? She wanted to make sure that it did not contain any pulp.

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bronson watt walks into a bar.

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a dog and a duck went out for a meal they both ordered lobster and enjoyed the night.

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You know whats funnier than 24? What? 25.

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What did the parrot say to the dumb man? Nothing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops