Did you here about the Asian couple who had a stupid baby? They named him Sum Ting Wong

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Why did the old lady talk to a tree? She had Alzheimer's and was going to die.

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womens rights

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what do you call a a miget crossed with a vampire? A miget, vampires are a figment of you're screwed up imagination.

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A black man shoots some hoops. One of the bullets bounces off the rim and hits him in the eye. The man dies. His grandmother is still alive to attend his funeral.

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scenario: retarded monkey upside down in a mirror question: why is jims dad fat answer: the mexican chicken is an aperadus

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What shouldn't you say to a dementia patient? You already said that.

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How do you make Lady Gaga sad? You kill her family.

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what is red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket Waht is blue and looks like a bucket? (99% of the time they will say "a blue bucket") No, a red bucket in disguise!

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roses are red violets are blue tis poem makes no sense so screw you

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What did the man say to the man with no head? You have no head

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whats funny? when isreal special forces hunted down nazis after ww2 and killed the fucks

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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What is big and white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? I don't know. I cant think f anything big and white that fall from trees that can kill you and besides if it is big enough to kill you then you will likely see it and avoid the section of that tree lest the big white object should fall and kill you because of this it is likely that anything that is big and white and falls from trees will in result kill you.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cancer

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whats worse than being raped by a giant scorpion getting raped by 2 giant scorpions

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What do you call the offspring of a gerbil and a hamster? Whatever you want.

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What did the black man say before he went to sleep? im going to sleep

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A little boy who can't reach the doorbell.

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Why did the fireman go to the police station? He didn't go to the police station, he went to the fire station.

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Why did the boy fall off the swings? He had no arms.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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Why are objects in your mirror closer than they appear? Because they are closer than they appear.

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4 gay men walk into a bar,but there is only one stool..... What do they do? Turn it over

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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