Why did the little kid fall down? He was pushed

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A man walks into a bar and asks for 6 vodka shots. The bartender looks at him in a strange manner. The man quickly downs all 6 of the vodka shots. The bartender looks at the man and says "Jeepers mate, whats the celebration?" The man replies "Well mate, first blow job today" The bartender in a kind gesture says "Here you go mate, next one is one me" while pouring another shot. The man respectfully replies, "No thanks mate, if 6 didn't get the taste away, im sure 7 won't"

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Walking down a cold, lonely, deserted street is a 10 year old who lost her parents. she has with her in plain sight her fathers wallet, so full of cash that it is literally too full. all of a sudden, a black man with a gum jumps out from around the corner. he then proceeds to mug her and shoot her. thanking the man for playing cops with her using finger guns, she goes home with a new coffee mug and a stick of gum. she died three days later from unrelated incidents.

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why did the chicken cross the road? regardless of the fact his job at kfc was there, he felt that exercise was need to work off is thighs

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A white man and a black man enter a public toilet. When they both begin to pee, the white man looks over at the black man. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype, and then feels slightly depressed over his closet homosexuality. Both men leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself asleep that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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whats the difference between a turkey and a baby i dont know how to cook a turkey

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Too many because they are babies and they don't have the motor skills to properly use a paintbrush.

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Person 1:"Knock Knock" Person 2: Whos there.... Wait why did you literally say the words "Knock Knock" Person 1: I have no idea

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Jack and Jill went up the hill....Just kidding, it was only Jill. Jack had no legs

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Why was the Jewish boy afraid of an oven? The last oven malfunctioned and killed his father.

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hi

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Why was six afraid of seven? A: He just does.

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why did a bunch of black kids play in a pile of leafs? to have fun :)

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Vegeta, What does the scouter say about his power level? It's Over 9000!!!!!

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What's worse then the holocaust? Stepping on a lego.

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Timmy: "Dear Santa, why don't you ever come to my house?" Santa: "Because you don't have parents, Timmy" THE END

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Why did Betty fall out of the tree? Because she was dead! ????

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Q: What's the capital of Ohio A: O

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Where did the AIDS victim go on vacation? To the hospital.

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What has nine arms and sucks? Four children with two arms snacking on a lollipop, and one child with one arm snacking on a lollipop.

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What do you get when you cross an own and a bungee cord? My ass

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Wanna here a funny joke... Trevor michael dyess's social life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops