There are 3 guys named:Poop, Shut up and Manners. They all were speeding down the street, they took a sharp turn and Poop fell out of the back. A cop pulled them over while Manners got out to go get Poop. The cop says, "whats your name." "Shut up." "No seriously whats your name." "Shut up" he says a little bit harsher. "Wheres your manners?" the cop says. "Back there picking up Poop."

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Want to hear something funny? Sure, what? 9/11

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Presents

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whats the difference between Michael Jackson and a shopping cart? One holds groceries. The other molests small children.

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? I throw a refrigerator at him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Bob Hi bob, come inside. And next time just use the doorbell

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roses are red violets are blue i'm a schizophrenic and so am i

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Yo mamma is so dumb, she bought a Wii and was satisfied with her purchase

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What happened to the kid who brome his neck? He died.

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why did it take the black man 1.5 hours to get out of a movie theater? he wanted to patiently wait for the movie to end.

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A man walk to the store and buys some clothes.

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Are you from Tennessee? Because you look like a product of incest

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Why did the two children go sledding? Because they liked to sled.

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Why couldn't little Timmy turn in his homework? Because on the way to school little Timmy was hit by a bus

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A blind man jumped out of the way as a car ran through the red light at a one way street.

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i read the terms of service when i posted this

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ahmadinejad. Well then get the **** away from my door!

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How did young Austin get home while walking on the side of the street ? He didnt. He was hit by a car.

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How did little Jimmy survive the 5 story fall? He didn't

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Who let the dogs out? Their owner because he had come to the rational conclusion that they were cooped up in their cage all night and were in serious need of relieving themselves and needed love and affection

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What did the cop say to the black man being arrested? His Miranda rights.

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roses are red violets are blue i'm allergic to pollen achoo

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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