What did the deaf, dumb, blind, parapalegic kid get for Christmas? Some home health supplies. He really needed them, too.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The farmer quickly saw the chicken escaping and grabbed it before it caught any dangerous outside diseases, making his entire flock go bad, and therefore making the farmer go bankrupt.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A horse walks into a bar, it broke both its legs and was then put down.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Yo momma is so ugly that she uses it as motivation to work hard and thus for achieve more than a lot of whores do

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What Do you say to an atheist after he sneezes? Bless you. Its just polite

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's faster a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a Muslim guy on a plane? A passenger.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

whats big fat round and bounces on the ground? a ball and your mum

thumb_up thumb_down -5

roses are red voliets are blue u actule thought i would cry over you!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

yo mama is so fat, when she stepped on the scale it said, 200 l.b.s

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How many lollipops does it take to shingle a dog? Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the boy eat the apple. He really likes apples.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's worse than stapling a baby to a tree? Stapling the same baby to ten trees.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why does Eric Clapton use a Mac? Because he prefers Macs.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a poor Donald Trump? Donald Trump

thumb_up thumb_down -5

I know a kid named Ruslonia. What type of name is that?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a cheese that's not yours? Cheese

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Listen Erron, what`s wrong? I would have told you to go fuck yourself if it where not for the fact that AzureDragon just left for the cafeteria and is nowhere to be seen.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's something that really sucks? Having a homicidal cat on your chest.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

glasses, jacket, shirt They call me glasses, jacket, shirt man. I never leave the house...without my brodies. hehehe hahaha hohoho!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What"s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Doctor, Doctor. I think I've broke my arm! I'm going to refer you to the fracture clinic.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Remember when Jesse Ziegenbein was skinny?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops