If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

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Why doesn't the boy get anything for Christmas? His parents died the night before!

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? It doesn't matter, the only chuck that matters is Chuck Norris.

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Friend: Do you want to go to the bar or see a movie first? Me: Yes.

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If you place a dog next to a cow, they're not the same size

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No one knows because it never told anyone. Chickens can't talk.

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KONY 2012! *world rises up cheering in spontaneous patriotism for Africa* Leader of KONY 2012 arrested for public masturbation

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I bet I can say the the whole Greek alphabet faster than any other person in the world. The whole Greek alphabet faster than any other person in the world.

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A blond, a brunette, and an Asian take a test. They all get exceptional grades and pass college.

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periods are red waffles are blue your mum's a milf I sucked her boob

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"Knock Knock" "Whose there?" Someone who needs to consider not saying "Knock Knock" every time they are about to enter a building.

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How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Q: What is worse than a dead baby in a trashcan? A: A dead baby in 10 trashcans.

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Your mom is over the average weight for a person of here height and age.

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Why did the chicken successfully cross the road? It didn't in the middle of the street it got hit by a car.

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How did the black man get a car? He bought it.

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What do accountants do when they're constipated? Take a laxative and eat plenty of fiber.

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Q: What do you call a man with a spade in his head? A: An ambulance.

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Pitbull is Mr. Worldwide because his music sucks everywhere in the world

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What do you call a black flying an airplane? A pilot you racist bastard.

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Wuy are Kenyans so fast? Because due to variations in evolution, people from that part of the world have a better muscle build to run at higher speeds than equally trained athletes from other parts of the world.

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osama bin ladin is dead. let's get a beer.

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Todd is offered a pizza, chinese food, and a sandwich. he then kills himself because options trigger a psychological disorder that was diagnosed to him as a child

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In an effort to bond, the American president and North Korean Supreme Leader place a bet on a football game. If the President was correct, the Supreme Leader would have to buy them a drink, and vice versa. The game is close but in the end the President's bet wins. He asks for the drink, but the Supreme Leader refuses. An argument breaks out, and lasts for several hours. Eventually the Supreme Leader becomes too infuriated, and leaves. So the next day, North Korea declares war on America and launches nuclear missiles towards them, millions of lives are lost, and the world descends into anarchy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops