Q. Why did the squirrel cross the road? A. Because it was stapled to the chicken.

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What does Obama, the President of the United States of America see when he closes his eyes? His eyelids

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Girl: I wrote a poem. Boy: Let's hear it! Girl: I like you, thats a start. You don't, so we are growing apart. In my heart there's a little tear, its funny to see how much you care. I hate the way you played my heart. You never finish what you start. Boy: Cool. Whose is for? Girl: You... Boy: Wow ummm, I have to go to......................yeah bye.

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Q: What did Steve say to his teacher on the first day of school? A: "My name is Steve."

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~Roses Are Red~ ~Violets Are Blue~ ~I Am Straight~ ~Not Sure About You~ ~Tell us?~

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what did the man say after he fell off the cliff nothing, he's dead

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Why cant women drive? Actually, they can

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*The doctor walks in* Knock knock. Whos there? Doctor. Doctor Who?

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Why did the car catch fire? It was parked in Ferguson, MO

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Why did the boy fail the test? He had down syndrome.

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What do you call an Ethiopian with buck teeth? Lucky to have teeth.

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"What's your name?" "Josephine." "Josephine?" "No, Josephine." "That's what I said." "I know,"

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

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Q: What is the leading cause of pedophilia? A: Sexy children.

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Person 1:"Knock Knock" Person 2: Whos there.... Wait why did you literally say the words "Knock Knock" Person 1: I have no idea

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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whats a great gift to share with small children? Ebola

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How many fish fingers does it take to change a lightbulb? Five.

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knock knock whos there banana banana who knock knock whos there orange orange who orange you glad I didn't say banana

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Q: What did the bulbasaur say to the charmanderr?? A: bulbasaurrr

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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You: Ask me if I like lasagna. Them: Do you like lasagna? You: No.

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A guy asks someone's name. The other guy answer that his name is Steeve.

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What do you call Jack Black on a bad day? Kevin Hart.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops