Q) What do you get when you cross a brown chicken with a brown cow? A) An abomination

What did Stephen Hawking say to a prostitute? Push me, and then just touch me, Till I can get my, Satisfaction.

Why was the muslim surprised? A tyrannosaurus rex bit off his legs.

What's worse then me banging your mom? The fact that I gave her HIV

What's worse than getting hit by a bus? Getting hit by two buses.

Why was 10 afraid of 9? Because 9 8 7

Vote this down and get DOXED

Two Jews walk into a concentration camp. One goes to work and the other one gets gassed.

Hickory Dickory Dock. 2 mice ran up the clock. The clock struck one.. and the second one got away with major injuries, dying in a hospital three days later. The clock is now serving its 8th year in jail out of 25 years, and does not regret anything.

Q:how do you make a rockstar cry? A: hit him with a breifcase

Q. what is the most amazing animal in the world? A. MULLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

What body part do you shave other than your balls? My fridge.

womens rights.

A white guy, a black guy, and an asian guy are all sitting on a park bench. They share several minutes of uncomfortable silence due to cultural differences.

4 gay men walk into a bar,but there is only one stool..... What do they do? Turn it over

What is worse then a bus driver A man who drives an ice cream truck

Your cat was in pain after after a stack of books suddenly fell on it. It's pain is extra-strong so you give it ExtraStrength Tylenol. Guess what happens next time? Nothing. It takes only 50mg to 60mg of Tylenol to poison a cat. 1 ExtraStrength Tylenol tablet is about 10 times that amount (500mg). You killed your cat. It's dead now and there is no "next time"..

What do you call a man who is walking into walls and poles? A blind man who really needs your help.

Yo momma's so black, when yo poppa rides her, he says "Look! I'm Hiccup!"

Dude man, I'm high...

That day where Captain America becomes too weak and frail to hold his own shield.

Why did Susy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? NOT SUSY!

What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

What's white and can't climb trees? Yogurt

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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