What happens if you type "Michael Jackson" divided by "Friends" on a calculator? DIVIDE BY 0 ERROR.

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A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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Rebecca Black and Justin Bieber get married.... Friends and family attend the wedding

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where is the world?

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Why should you never shower with a pokemon? Pokemon is a game for children. In doing so you would greatly disturb your child who is quite fond of pokemon

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knock knock whos there open open who the door

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ask me if im a boy are you a boy? none of your buisness.

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Whats the biggest party fowl? Murder

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Why did the old lady have a heart attack? She got raped by a giraffe.

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Why did the midget fall from a tall building? Because somebody pushed him.

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If you die laughting, How are you telling this to me?

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What's big, black, juicy, large, and succulent? A gourmet meatball.

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yes i can connor, this is brett.

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What do you do if there's a rabid elephant chasing behind you, a vicious jaguar to your right, a rearing horse to your left, and a bloodthirsty lion in front of you? Innoculate yourself with a rabies vaccine, prod the jaguar on the nose with a stick (they hate that and will probably flee as a result), speak softly and calmly to the horse and encourage the lion to go for the elephant instead of you. You will probably still die as a combined result of mauling and trampling, and it's unlikely that you'll have two rabies vaccines to hand by chance for such situations, but your chances of survival will be minimally improved.

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A giraffe walks into a bar.... just kidding, a giraffe wouldnt fit in a bar.

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person 1: wanna hear a knock knock joke? Person 2: sure! Person 1: okay you start person 2: knock knock Person 1: who's there?

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never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down

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Ethan's girlfriend is a salg hahahahahahahahahahahaha fucking meff she needs to die

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A black man, a Muslim man, and a Jewish man walk into a bar so the bartender says, "Get the f*** out."

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One time at band camp, We practice playing our instruments and had fun.

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Why don't women bother to have penises? Because they're lazy and they don't care.

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What did the man give his wife for her anniversary? Nothing. The man is a raging alcoholic and forget her anniversary due to his high alcoholic intake during the past few weeks. Even if he did remember he most likely didn't care after seeing his wife cheat on him with another woman putting his marriage into shambles.

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"Knock, knock!" "Who's there?" "The police." "'The police', who?" "Sir, come out of your domicile with your hands up and no weapons present. You've just gone to an orphanage and massacred almost every nun who's worked there for almost five years. Not only that, but your son has also contracted AIDS from his previously lesbian girlfriend whom she has lost her mother too in the orphanage accident you've just caused."

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Q: Imagine you are driving a boat, but the wheel falls off. So how many pancakes can you fit in that box? A: None, because the oranges couldn't talk!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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