Knock knock! Who's there? Hitler, time to shower!

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What has 2 legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog

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So a guy walks into a bar.... he gets a few drinks pays his bill and goes home.

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What's funnier than 24? Nothing, 24 is just a number. There's is nothing humorous about it. Go away.

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Yo momma so fat she saw a yellow bus full of white kids and said, "STOP THAT TWINKIE!!"

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter what you call him he isn't coming anyway!!!!

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Why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because you would get charged with vehicular manslaughter and have the NAACP all up in your ass.

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What do you call a dog that can't pass an Algebra test? A dog.

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You know whats funny Aids

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Little Jimmy had walked in on his parents. "Mummy what are you doing with dad?" "Baking a cake" She replied. Two hours later the cake had then cooled and was consumed by all.

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What did one dinosaure say to the other? Nothin, they are all dead. XD

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You know whats funny? Matty Broom.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

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A antijoke? The "new and better" Duke Nukem. "Power armor is for poossies! My ego is going to... ARGH! Both my arms are blown away... well Duke Nukem is too awesome! He uses his legs..ARGH MY LEGS! Well Duke Nukem is dead... but his ego will keep the remains of his corpse fighting aliens! Yeah ego!" Nukem: I got balls of fail...

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Women's rights

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing Jenga on September 11th.

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whats yellow and cant swim? A bulldozer

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A man walks into a bar. Realizing he forgot his ID, he leaves.

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A Jew walks into a bar........... he buys it.

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Why is an Orange, Orange??? Because its not blue!

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When Kurt Cobain was little, his mother told him to never play with guns but I guess it went through one ear and out the other.

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Yo mama so poor that she's having trouble making ends meet without government assistance.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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