What would you do for a klondike bar? Walk to the corner store to buy one.

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did you stub your toe?

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Why did the poorly educated man get fired from the M&M factory? He changed the M's to W's!

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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Granny P-O-R-N!!!!

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How do you make a businessman cry? Shoot him in the kneecaps.

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Why were you in an igloo? I don't know, why were you?

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why did the girl chug her tub of frosting? she had no spoon

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Why did the monk shave his head? So he's more aerodynamic.

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What do you call a person that smells like shite and chases uglier girls than him? .. . . . . . . .. . . . . . Smelly McD the smelly cunt

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Why did Suzie fall off the swings? Because she didn't have arms or legs. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Suzie

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Roses are red violets are blue faces like yours belong in the zoo don't be mad ill be there too not in the cage but laughing at you!!

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Why did my ex-husband get fired from the m&m factory? He was throwing away all the W's.

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Why was the boy sad he ate a loaf of bread? Because ducks ate him alive after that.

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Why is a blonde girl crying in the bathroom? Because she has been bullied and someone broke her nose.

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Why did Juan cross the border into America? To provide a better opportunity for him and his family.

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A: Knock, knock. B: Who's there? The writer of this joke had no idea how to end this.

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what did the man say when he walked into the bar? Ouch!

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why did suzy fall off the swing? she has no arms, knock knock who's there? Not suzy!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are simple-minded creatures and perhaps there was some source of food on the other side.

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"I see!" said the blind man, as he picked up a saw and hammer.

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Alice, seriously do as I say, I lived with the man for over 16 years, those are not hallucinations, its PTSD, without ritalin he will just go trough that agony for nothing, not coffee not chocolate or any of that, anything that helps his focus. Seriously do not be a bitch Alice, listen to him and do as he says. Its not the first time people think he is having hallucinations when his eyes start moving back and forth like crazy, he is not seeing things, he is experiencing this as if they where real, and just because he can stay in that state for days, does not mean he is meant to go trough that kind of agony because of your ethics or caring or whatever your hesitation might be, the man can go without food for weeks if he has to, but not after you sneak trash like Zopiclone into his system. That was a mistake of yours, make up for it Alice, or ill make you pay.

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A man walks into a bar. His alcohol dependency is killing is family.

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Q: Whats worse than being raped by a giant scorpion A: Getting raped by three giant scorpion's

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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