How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

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Hi

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69.9

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why does king kong so fat? because he eats to much

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Yo mammas so fat she went on a diet.

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You walk in to your room. 7 chickens on your bed.

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What is the difference between muffins and cornbread? I don't enjoy sticking cornbread in my anus.

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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Why did Charlie fall? He got shot 24 times in the chest.

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Susie is 14 & she never listens to her mom, why is that? She's deaf.

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What's worse than a black President... George W Bush

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What is colourful and explodes in the air. I don't know but it sounds cool!

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What did the penguins get for Christmas? A hang-glider What did the polar bears get for Christmas? Death, The Holocaust, Global Warming, and all of Steven King's books.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a Cadillac? A Cadillac is a car, and a dead baby is a morose and disgusting topic of internet humor.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? A Jew is a person either born into or converted to Judaism, and a Pizza is a disc shaped, oven baked bread typically topped with tomato sauce and cheese.

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womens sports...

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Your so ugly That when you look into a mirror it shows an accurate potrail of your unproportionit face

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I bought a DVD called "the 18 holes of Tiger Woods". It was a fascinating incite into the golfing technique of arguably one of the greatest sportsmen of all time.

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The pope and three young boys get into a cab. The pope tells the driver to take the boys home.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I just ding dong ditched you.

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Once there was two fish in a tank, and one said "how do you drive this thing?".

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How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get a ladder and carry him down.

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What do the Holocaust and baseball have in common? They are sports, except the Holocaust.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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