How do you have sex with the blue waffle? stick your penis inside

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Q: Why did the bully hit the kid A:Because he is a bully-I thought that would have been self explanitory.

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You're momma's so fat, she's got high cholesterol.

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How do you get rid of a boomerang? There are many potential options for getting rid of your boomerang. You can choose to pass it on to somebody as a gift, make a profit through thrift stores or online auctions or perhaps sell it in a newspaper. Alternatively you may wish to simply dispose of it. The average reading speed of an American adult is 300 words per minute. This was exactly 100 words. This means that it took approximately 20 seconds to read it. This means that approximately 4 people died of cancer world wide while you read this.

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How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get a ladder and carry him down.

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i think i have a problem with these jokes they aren't finny

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because my first shot missed.

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wats worse than gettin bitched at by ur mom? gettin raped by a giant scorpian n getting SUPER ULTRA MEGA AIDS

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What can be any colour and is made of leather? Cars. I lied about the leather part.

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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Your momma's so fat... She's on a diet.

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Knock, Knock. Come in.

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Haikus are awesome, but sometimes they dont make sense. Refrigerator.

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Why did the baby cross the road? cause it was stapled to the chicken.

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A wolf boards a plane with two dead rabbits in his mouth. The flight attendant approaches him and says, "Sir, you can only have one of those on the plane." The wolf bites her throat out.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? A Jew is a person either born into or converted to Judaism, and a Pizza is a disc shaped, oven baked bread typically topped with tomato sauce and cheese.

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Why Did the baby cross the street? He was stapled to the chicken's back

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Me: Knock Knock! You: Door's Open!

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Q: What is hard and long on a man? A: His wife's funeral

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing set? She had no arms.

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Why does Jonny have a phobia birds? Because he has one glued to his face.

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I bought a DVD called "the 18 holes of Tiger Woods". It was a fascinating incite into the golfing technique of arguably one of the greatest sportsmen of all time.

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What do you call a black man jumping out of a plane? A skydiver

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What starts with an F and ends with a UCK? Firetruck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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