What did the phone say to the telephone? I can't connect with you.

What couldn't the Asian drive? Because he had just gotten laser eye surgery, and the doctor recommended that he didn't drive for a few days.

What's the difference between a teacher and a train? A lot.

What's the biggest difference between the East and West Coast? About 3,000 miles.

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -.......

why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

What did the furnace say to the Jew? Nothing, as it is an inanimate object and cannot communicate.

Knock Knock. who's there? It's me. you need to be specific...

What's the difference between a white man and a black man? Nothing. They are both created in God's image and likeness so get your mind outta the gutter!

Whats orange and has stripes? - a tiger

why did the child go to school? Because he wants to succeed in life

two muffins were in an oven. one muffin says, "gee, its hot in here." the other one says, "AH! A TALKING MUFFIN!"

Oxygen and magnesium are going out OMG Think science the you might get it If not O oxygen mg magnesium

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

Why did the fat man fall faster than the skinny man? He didn't. Masses does not affect the speed of falling objects. Everything with mass and volume falls with an acceleration of 9.81m/s^2 on Earth. Therefore the greater mass of the heavier man did not affect his falling speed. Both men fell at the same speed.

Q:What are black basketball players good at? A:Running,shooting and stealing.

Do you know what's fun about having sex with twenty-seven year-olds? There are twenty of them.

Oh look, I've found my knife

i was molested.

Haikus are awesome, but sometimes they dont make sense. Refrigerator.

Q: How did that man get two black eyes? A: He was born!

what has green paint and flies? a garbage truck

A man is sitting on a bench in a park crying a man walking by asks why he's crying, and the man answers that he has no idea why he's crying

What did the lawyer get for Christmas? More paper work

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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