What's pink and smells like chicken? A pink hair band, I was lying about the chicken part.

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Why was the man sad after mowing is lawn? He ran over his dog.

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What's the biggest difference between the East and West Coast? About 3,000 miles.

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If you helped Jack on the horse, would you help Jack off the horse? Of course; if he was too short to climb onto the saddle then it would be irresponsible and potentially dangerous not to help him off. As his riding instructor, you would be liable for any injuries Jack sustained had he attempted to dismount the horse with no assistance.

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What do you call an animal who is purple and feeds on grass? Well his name is Timmy, he is a 6 year old boy and has been diagnosed with a rare deadly disease that turns his skin purple and has removed him so far from reality that he has begin to feed on his front lawn.

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What do you call a man with three testicles? Polyorchid. Look it up.

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Why didn't little jimmy get anything for Christmas? He is Jewish.

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why did the boy drop his ice cream? he tripped over his mother's dead body

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what did the atheist get for Christmas? Nothing. If he was being truly honest to his beliefs, he wouldn't partake in a christian holiday.

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What starts with an F and ends with a UCK? Firetruck.

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What do you call a boy that fell off a ferry? Extremely unlucky, since one of the other passengers noticed and the captain turned the ferry around, threw him a ladder, and pulled him aboard. Also he died of hepatitis because his mother was too poor to afford condoms, so he was born with it.

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A black man and a hispanic man are riding in a car. Who's driving? The hispanic man

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What runs faster than a nigger with a stolen tv? His brother with the remote

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A man walked into a bar. What did he say? Ouch.

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Why did the chess grandmaster lose his mind? Because he died of old age.

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Q. Why do Puerto Ricans throw their trash away in clear plastic bags? A. So Italians can go window shopping.

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Whats better than pizza? Pepperoni pizza, if you like pepperoni that is.

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What did the republican say to the democrat? You suck!

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What did the grass say to the human "Hey" The human then screams and runs to safety

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Butter. Butter who? Oh, um, sorry i forgot the rest...

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Animal cruelty

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Q:What's the difference between a pinata and a baby? A: One I hang from a tree and beat to death and the other one is a pinata..

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Why'd the cat have one eye? It got kicked by a goat.

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Why do Jewish people like money so much? Because they can exchange it for goods and services

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops