A: Knock, knock. A: Knock, knock! A: Um ... Knock, knock! B: Sorry, I didn't want to answer the door.

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How does he keep getting girls to sleep with him? Bear-traps..

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Two men walk into a bar, one ducks

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How did the man with no legs get around? He was assisted by a nurse or relative who was kind enough to take on such a task.

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A dog walks into a club. Just kidding I hit the dog with a club multiple times, killed it, and went to jail for the murder of an innocent animal.

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you know what is so funny hillary clinton!!!!!!

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Whats the difference between a hundred dead babies and a Ferrari? The Ferrari isn't in my garage.

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Once upon a time there was a man exercising, he pulled a muscle and had to have his heart removed. In other words, don't exercise. The end.

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Horse with a chair on his head.

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what do you call a man with no arms no legs cancer and down syndrome? you call him stephen because his name is stephen

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Where's the soap?

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"Sticks and stones" the man said and shat on three different complex turtles

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue U suck Dick Just Like Ur Dad did to u

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

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Three guys walk into a bar. They each have a few drinks. Then all three leave responsibly in a taxi.

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Knock knock. Who's there? No one, because your house burned down.

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One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Well you should really try some.

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Why was the black man tangled in chains at the bottom of the ocean? Because he was a highly skilled diver and environmentalist who tragically entangled himself and consequently died slowly and painfully of suffocation while trying to save a whale from eating waste metal.

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What did a blonde and a Puerto Rican name their baby? Joshua, after the blonde's grandfather who passed away a year earlier.

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Q:what is a wheelchairs biggest fear A: steps

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what did the terrorist get for christmas? probably nothing because terrorists are steriotypically muslim, but i imagine if not it was a gift close to his heart

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What do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? A Cog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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