Two women were sitting quietly.

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Q: What's worse than spilling milk all over the floor? A: Cleaning up the milk you spilled all over the floor.

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Why didn't the boy want his dinner? Because it was a bowl of vomit.

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What do you call a duck who votes democrat? A duck

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she wasn't a woman

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An alcoholic walks into a bar, but then realises he's ruining his family so he calls the rehab

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a man walks in to a night club he can not danse so he just wachis pepol

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Why did they bury the indian at the top of the hill? Because he was dead.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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what did the boy with no arms get for christmas? A pair of robtic arms and now he has super stregth so he fuk up any body who said he would get cancer.

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A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Why can't a dinosaur clap its hands? Dinosaurs are extinct.

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a group of jews went to a factory to apply for jobs. Only one came out.

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Why did I get thumbs down from everyone? Answer: Because they hate my anti-joke.

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what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch names

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Q: What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Easter? A: Diabetes

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could switching to Geico save you 15% or more on car insurence? Does a bear shit in the woods?

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what did "A" and "B" look for when they went to the beach? what are you talking about? letters cannot travel!

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A person tells an anti-joke. Nothing out of the ordinary happens.

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Yo mama so ugly she's ridiculed daily and has frequent suicidal thoughts.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you simply have a chicken joke WITHOUT it crossing the road

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Q: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if he tore his ACL last week trying out for wood chucking nationals? A: Woodchucks don't possess the ability to chuck wood, nor do they have ACLs.

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9/11

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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