WTF THINKING: "If you are going trough hell go back to where the path to hell began just get the fuck out of there you stupid dumbass muddaf0cker" "If you feel life is pushing you five steps back for each one you go forward, just turn your fucking back to your goal and you will get there in no time" "Never ever ever ever ever give up" -Fucking inspiring when you just give up after a certain number of "evers" "IT IS BETTER TO REIGN IN HEAVEN THAN TO SERVE IN HEAVEN!" "I forgot the rest" Nero the ONLY moralman (Fuck Neronism and they copying my shit, I am the only psychopath animal theRAPIST in town! (Female animals only, you think I am a pervert or something? Be ashamed you perverted deviant!)

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How do you kill a turtle? You can't, it has a shell for a reason.

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whats the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline? I take my shoes off to jump on the trampoline

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knock knock - "who's there" - "i'm a escaped convict who's here to murder you and rob your house" - "Well come in the doors already open"

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SQUID DOMINATION!!! Squids WILL Take Over the World!!!

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What's got one leg and no eyes? A leg.

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Have you heartd about the blond that confused winow putty for KY jelly? Her windows fell out.

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when you smile the whole world stops and stares for a while because you have one tooth and its half chipped.. and your a black mexican red head.

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Friends are like lettuce; If you eat their head, they die

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Your mother's breath smells so bad that it just doesn't smell very good at all.

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A man walks into a bar and says Ouch.

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why did the kid fall off his bike he had a serious illness which made it difficult for him to play sports

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If Oscar Meyer had a dog, what breed would it be? A golden retriever.

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9/11

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Why couldn't the blonde turn on the TV? The TV was broken.

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my friend said this website was funny, you know what i said?.... its really not!

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose... But you cannot be a dinosaur!

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A antijoke? The "new and better" Duke Nukem. "Power armor is for poossies! My ego is going to... ARGH! Both my arms are blown away... well Duke Nukem is too awesome! He uses his legs..ARGH MY LEGS! Well Duke Nukem is dead... but his ego will keep the remains of his corpse fighting aliens! Yeah ego!" Nukem: I got balls of fail...

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What did the black guy say in the phone? Hello

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Me and a pig had sex, beastieality.

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What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

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What do you call a Mexican policeman? Officer.

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How to open an orange? You don't you peal it

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Whats worse than getting hit by a bus? Getting hit by two busses.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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