How did the blind man escape the mugger? He ran into a bus.

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why was little jonny not playing in the baseball game? his legs were shattered in a terrible lawn mowing accident.

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What did the camel say to the polar bear at the bar? "Uuuhhrrhrhhh"

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what duz 69 mean? its a number duhhhhhhh

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What did the gay man see when he looked out the window? A UPS truck that was shipping a monkey

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what did one bean say to the other bean??? hows it been.

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Guest-knock knock (silence) Guest-hello is anyone there? no go away Guest-looks like there is no one here lets leave

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Say this really fast. Ice Bank Mice Elf It'll take a while for dumbasses to understand.

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What does it mean when you see a bunch of blacks running in one direction? That you need to be more specific.

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Roses are red violets are blue. A face like yours belongs in the zoo! But don't you worry I'll be there too! But not in the Ill be laughing at you

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Ring Ring! Hello? Hello, is your refrigerator running? Yes it is Good.

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1234567890? ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ

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A black guy and a white guy are in a car. What is going to happen? They will arrive at their destination.

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Why was the boy running There was a giraffe chasing him

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have u ever have to clean up ur own poop? me niether.

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Why did the man punch the women? I don't know, but he served jailtime

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Why is The stop sign bent? Because a ambulance full of sick kids hit it.

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Hey can you turn Tmartn upI can't hear him

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape

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Knock Knock Who's there? I eat mop I eat mop who? That's strange, most American's don't eat poo I'm Asian

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one time someone wrote an anti-joke, hoping for lots of likes, which give one a sense of validation. nope.

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why did Bernard have a bold because I ripped his Mohawk

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A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

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A bear and a rabbit both take a dump in the woods below an old oak tree. They look at each other, smile and nod their heads in acknowledgment of one another. The bear is first to let go of his rather large load and a loud THUMP is heard throughout the woods. Shortly after another and then another. The rabbit looks at the bear for a moment then turns closes his eyes and begins to strain. Finally the sound of what can only be described as a machine gun rattles through the wood. Looking impressed the bear looks over at the rabbit as it pops off its last few pellets. When the rabbit is finished the bear asks "Do you have a problem with the shit sticking to your fur?" The rabbit thinks for a moment then looks at the bear and says "Umm... No, not really." So the bear uses the rabbit to wipe his arse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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