what rhymes with ham and bread? girl, make me a sandwich

Q: Who was the best Jewish cook? A: Hitler.

How do you make a blonde fall off of a cliff? You push her off of the cliff.

9/11

A Black man walks into the Dentist's office, because he cares about his hygiene.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

A man gets hit by a car. His family is sad and plans a funeral.

Q: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if he tore his ACL last week trying out for wood chucking nationals? A: Woodchucks don't possess the ability to chuck wood, nor do they have ACLs.

what did "A" and "B" look for when they went to the beach? what are you talking about? letters cannot travel!

A person tells an anti-joke. Nothing out of the ordinary happens.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you simply have a chicken joke WITHOUT it crossing the road

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Why did the man laugh? Because humans laugh when they hear a joke.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs falling skydiving? Jon, because that's his name.

Why is Ray Charles always smiling? He's not, corpses rarely smile

Did you hear about the absent minded professor that tried to change the tire on his pickup truck? He forgot to lock the jack and the truck crushed his head like and egg shell.

Don't tell anyone, the Health Department is already on our backs.

Kefka > Sephiroth

Why did the road cross the chicken? The 2 nouns in the sentence has been switched.

Aww good to see you looking positive! He said to the boy dying of HIV

What's funnier than a dead baby? A joke.

knock knock? who's there Dave Come on in!!!!!

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...