A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

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Q: What's worse than a worm in you're apple... A: The fact that you have all-timers and can't remember...

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Why do people who walk into bars never have names?

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You know what's gay? Grabbing another man's penis.

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Why aren't elephants allowed in public pools? Because they are elephants.

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The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

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How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

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Yo mamas so fat when she was standing on a scale a girl walked by and said hey thats my phone number! Yo mamas so fat she broke the family tree!

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Knock knock Who's there ... Hello? Is there anyone there? (In the bushes) Ha! He'll never suspect us!

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Lindsay Lohan

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A priest, a rabbi, and a muslim cleric walk into a bar. In Syria. Dead children.

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? One is a devotee of the torah, one is a delicious meal.

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what did the dog say to the mailman? "hey thanks for the mail" the mailman replies "your welcome"

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What's the difference between a mole and dynamite? - Moles don't explode... unless you fill them with dynamite.

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What's smelly and Dirty? Someone who hasn't shower in a reasonably long time.

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A Jew,Spiderman and The Incredible Hulk all jump off the top of the Empire State Building,who hits the ground first? The Jew because the other two dont exist

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Your momma's so old she might die soon.

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Knock, knock who's there? Not your Dad, because he left and created a better family.

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Q. How many infants does it take to paint a wall? A. Depends how hard you throw them...

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Did you see Stevie Wonder's new car? ....neither did he.

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What's worse than having a spiked club shoved up your butthole? Not much.

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anti-joke.com

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A house comes around the corner.

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One day a baby hit himself on the head with a stuffed animal. I lied, it was a brick, so he died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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