What is small, naked and covered in sperm My son

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knock knock who's there Bob oh hi, come in

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A rock walks into a bar. The town goes into extreme panic and is abandoned because rocks are inanimate objects.

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why did the little boy cross the road? because he had been raped.

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Anders Lungren is a worthless peice of scrub

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Mommy, Mommy, I don't like Daddy! Well leave him on the side of the plate and eat your peas instead!

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Knock Knock Who's there? It is actually not a good idea to say "who's there" to the random person outside. The man could be a robber or a murderer, and will realize a person is inside. He could bomb the door down and do anything to kill you. You should look through the window first, or through the little peep hole. If the person outside is an acquaintance, then you can respond. However it is best to not reply and leave the stranger alone. Safety is key to living a happy joyful life.

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Q: Whats Long, Black and Smells? A: Sh*t

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Why did the family at dinner not tip the waiter? He was mean and spat in their food.

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What has four wheels and flies? A flying car.

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i walked into a bar, the bar tender for some reason said get out. the bartender did not realise that i was the #1 criminal in america. but why would he, i was in cuba. ( i was seven at the time)

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Why can't sluts count to 70? Well, slut is a derogative term for prostitutes, and most prostitutes are people that had rough, often traumatising childhoods. Many ran away from home at an early age, thus leaving them devoid of a proper education.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get mowed down by a tractor

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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69 cents for a rainbow donut shaped as a 69....

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What do you call a joke with no punchline?

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A priest, a pedophile, and a child rapist walks into a bar. He orders a beer.

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What did the smoker say when he coughed? Ohhh dam it's turned into a smokers cough

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What did the P.E. coach say to the fat kid? you need to exercise

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What makes Amish bread different than regular bread? It's made by Amish people

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Why did the black 10 year old miss school? Because his grandmother just had a severe heart attack and the whole family is coming in to visit and pay their last respects.

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What did the vegetarian order for lunch? A dead baby.

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Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

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84.52% of users disapprove of your post, plus or minus 3%.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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