Why did Jessy crawl to her bed? Because she has no legs.

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Wanna hear a joke??... No...... oh ok :(

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Q: What did the duck say to the bartender? A: Nothing considering that ducks cannot speak

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Why did Timmy fall down the stairs Because he is blind and I pushed him

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What do you get when you mix red and yellow together? rellow

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Sharvil has aids 4 times

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what do you call a tall skiny kid with a very big ego autistic

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why did the guy get pulled over he had a broken tail light

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knock knock whose there? you have AIDS

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A man walks into a bar. Cool story, bro.

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why did the 60 year old touch the little boy's penis? because he was a pedophile.

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How many Jews does it take to bake a turkey using an oven, I don't know but it only takes one Jew to stuff one.

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What is black white and red all over A tree in black, white, and red paint.

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Your in Thailand on a Elephant ride... at the end you jump off but uncle jack is still on the elephant and the elephant wont let him off.... Do you help your uncle, Jack off the elephant?

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Knock Knock Who's there Me Me who ME LET ME IN

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Michael walked into a bar, The rest of the bar initially erupted with laughter until the his carer made everybody aware that Michael suffered from brittle bones and that he had actually fractured his hip after colliding with the bar. People then understood the gravity situation as the bartender immediately dialled the emergency services. Michael managed to recover physically from the accident but to this day he is still scarred from the laughter aimed at him the night of his accident and is too afraid to return to the bar again in fear of being mocked despite the misunderstanding of the situation.

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Statistically 9/11 Americans wont get this joke. But 7/7 British will.

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What did the deaf guy say to the other deaf guy? Nothing.

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What do you calk a couple of friends hanging out? An intimate get-together.

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What did Pikachu say to Charmander? Nothing. Pokemon are fictional creatures, and thus, do not exist.

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Goats are like toilets, I shit in them

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Q: how many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: two, one to hold the ladder securely and the other to screw in the lightbulb.

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Gotta go Mark Gotta go Mark MARK MARKMARKMARK! Moving at the speed of mark I'm the quickest mark around Got ourselves a mark Start getting a new mark Without any mark On top of mark! Go- Go- Go- Don't mark Don't mark Just markmarkmarkmark! mark, he's on the run mark, he's number one mark, he's coming next so watch out for mark X! Gotta go mark, gotta go mark mark mark markmarkmark Go go go go go go go go go! marrrrrkkk X!!

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Life is like a box of chocolates. Except it's not usually a rectangular or love heart shaped... nor does it contain small expensive assorted candy... life may not also contain nuts... or be devoured by our fellow human... Life is not like a box of chocolates

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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