How many Alzheimer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

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What has two legs and two arms? A Human

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Why did the man fall of the cliff? A: Because someone pushed him.

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Yesterday I told a chemistry joke. There was no reaction.

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Why did the chicken cros- oh he got hit by a car.

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Ok is 25 really funnier than 24 because i think 8008 or 5318008 are way funnire tahn 24 or 35 just saying

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a beer.

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My mother has chlamydia. That's it.

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I went to the opticians to get my eyes checked. The optician said "you need glasses".

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What's red and fun to drink through a bendy straw? Period blood

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Banana! Banana who? Knock knock! Who's there? Banana! Banana who? Knock knock! Who's there? Orange! Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't stab you 17 times in the kidney?

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A pig walks into a bar and says, "Oink."

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What did the kid with all F's on his report card get? Beat by his parents

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What did the elephant say to the clown? Swell, morning isn't it?

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Why don't women have breasts? Because they have dandruff. Get it? Hint: "dandruff" = "dan druff"

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5 - samios in a wheelchair.

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What is the difference between a dolphin and a ghost? A dolphin is not a ghost

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What's sad about a dog and it's owner dying in a car accident? They were on their way to the vet.

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wanna hear a dirty joke? ...trashcan

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How many dead kids can you fit into a plastic bag in your trunk? Ask Kasey Anthony

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Why did the man open up a umbrella? Because it was raining..

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Dusters blow stuff.

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Roses are red, Violets are too. I'm colour blind, It's a very depressing infliction.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops