How does Hitler like his juice? With pulp

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What do you call a dog with no legs? A dog.

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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why was the apple on the ground? because it fell

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knock,knock you suck

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Why was Billy unhappy? He was molested by a black guy.

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The president, Oprah and Abraham Lincoln are sitting in a crashing airplane. lol

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I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

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What did the man say while he was in surgery? Nothing, he was in surgery.

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your period is red your waffle is blue find a way to fix it or no sex for you!

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Did you hear about the guy who came onto his best friend's wife? Yeah, she handed him some kleenex after and told him to wipe it off.

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Why did helen kellers dog committ suicide? You would to if you had massive clinical depression.

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Why did the cat eat himself? He was hungry

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She got her arms cut off. Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a truck. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why did the little boy refuse to kiss his grandmother? He was afraid she would slip him some tongue.

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If Voldemort was gay who would be his partner? Happy potter

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What did the autistic man say to the woman? I have autism

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A black man and a white man were in a fight. Who won? I don't know. It was pay-per view and I didn't buy it.

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How many women does it take to unscrew a light bulb? Usually just one, and a ladder.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? - Because she had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up again? - Because she had no legs. Why didn't anyone help her? - Because she had no friends. Knock knock. -Who's there? Not Sally.

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In retrospect, I was wrong to microwave all those cats.

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What's worse than someone who thinks Sting is a nice guy? Sting.

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whats worse than a friend asking you if their ugly, telling them to look in the mirror.

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whats the difference between ian bothom and david gower? shredded wheat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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