I was going to write a joke about Alzheimers ... but I completely forgot it.

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A white man, a black man, and a Hispanic man are in car, who is driving? The black man, it's his car.

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Whats the most fun thing you can do with hangers and a vaccum cleaner? -abort babies

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I remember this one time... I was sleeping... And all of a sudden... I woke up... Yeah.

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How many Jews can you fit in a one-person car? --One in the drivers seat, 30 million in the ashtray

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A man walked into doctors and said, “Doctor help! My arms have stopped working” to which the receptionist replied, “I’m not the doctor and you need to make an appointment.”

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The adventures of HAROLD THE MONGOOSE: Harry dug a hole. He did not like that hole so he dug a new one. He liked that hole so he did not dig another one. Harry slept on a rock. He did not like that rock. So he smashed it with a ham. Harry found a new rock. He liked that rock so he didn't smash it with a ham. Harry ate a snake. He did not like that snake so he regurgitated it. Harry ate another snake. He liked that snake so he did not regurgitate it. Harry encountered a bush. He did not like that bush. Unfourtianately for Harry, that Bush became president.

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What's worse than Gordon Brown's face? George Bush.

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What do you call a man with no legs or arms trying to ski? Impossible.

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What ever happened to the bartender that asked, "Why the long face?" He was punched hard on the face for asking a stupid cliche!

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Doctor doctor, I feel like listening to good music. Looks like you need "The Cure" to help with this.

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-Have you ever seen an elephant hidden behind a thread? -No. -How come you're seeing it, he's hidden.

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Why are there no casinos in Africa? Because of the exceptionally high poverty rate.

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Why is the country in a national deficit? Because the Illuminati want to control all human beings in a socialist new world order.

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whats black and large -me

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Yo mamas so ugly that when she looked out the window, she was arrested for mooning.

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Why did your ears get blasted with sound? You never turned the volume down..

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Jhon is riding his wheelchair, but can't get up the driveway. Lucky a stranger passes by. Jhon: Can you help me please sir? Stranger: No

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How do you confuse a blonde? I guess the same way you confuse someone of any other hair color.

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whats the difference between me and callum ? one soul.

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Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: Someone who just got stabbed to death reading the newspaper.

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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What's the connection between Obama and Michael Jackson? They both want to be a girl.

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Have you read Shakespeare? Dunno. Who wrote it? Shakespeare.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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