Q. Wheres your nan???? A. In my closet

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There once was a man from Dundee, Whose Limericks ended on line three. I don't know why.

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What happened to that guy who fell? He died from car accident 3 days later.

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how many pieces of wood can a lumberjack cut in a minute? three dead squrlles a hat and and half of a tree oh and a bus. and if u get in his way alot of guts spewed every where

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick

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Why did the student get expelled from a Christian school? He continually beat other students between class periods.

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the user is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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Knock knock ? Who's there ? Ipe Ipe who ? You sick !

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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The speeding car skidded on the rain-slicked roadway. Beyond the outside of the curve was a 100 meter drop-off. As the car slid toward the edge of the road, the driver and passenger both had a sick feeling in the pit of their stomach and wished they hadn't ordered vinegar milkshakes, the special of the day at Pickle Shack. Or it could have been the toadstools, but it didn't matter now.

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What's worse then getting socks on Christmas? Being murdered by a bear.

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What's the worst part about aids? Telling your wife and kids.

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What does a man want more than sex? Nothing.

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Q:What do you call a sheep with no legs? A: A cloud.

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Dear Jim, I have a problem with my Hymen... "Jim'll fix it for you..."

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Why did the kid fall? He got pushed off of a building

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The man says to the doctor "Sir, I have contracted a terrible headache." The doctor replies back, "Yes you do."

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How do you make a great cake? Bett Crocker books

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How do you get 2x1=4? Do the wrong math.

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What's the difference between a duck? One leg is both the same

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme Others just don't

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What do you call a puppy in alaska? A cold PUPPY!!!!!

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Why couldn't the man lick his elbows? Because it is scientifically proven that over 98% of humans can not lick their elbows.

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What made your girlfriend laugh to death? You dropped my pants.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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