Knock Knock JUST OPEN THE FLIPPIN DOOR ALREADY! I DON"T NEED YOU TO KNOCK AND INTRODUCE YOURSELF EVERY TIME YOU COME TO MY HOUSE!!! Jeez...seriously

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

That awkwad moment when a homeless man runs naked around a golf cource yelling hears the 19th hole bitches.

When life gives you lemons, you make grape juice and let the world wonder how you made it.

Q: What does a Jedi say when another Jedi farts? A: Who sabered the cheese?

What's taters, precious? The potato is a starchy, tuberous crop from the perennial Solanum tuberosum of the Solanaceae family.

Knock Knock Who's There Seventeen Thirty Eight I'm like hey what's up hello Seen yo pretty ass soon as you came in that door I just wanna chill, got a sack for us to roll Married to the money, introduced her to my stove Showed her how to whip it, now she remixin' for low She my trap queen, let her hit the bando We be countin' up, watch how far them bands go We just set a goal, talkin' matchin' Lambos Got 56 a gram, prob' a 100 grams though Man, I swear I love her how she work the damn pole Hit the strip club, we be letting bands go Everybody hating, we just call them fans though In love with the money, I ain't never letting go And I get high with my baby (baby) I just left the mall, I'm getting fly with my baby, yeah

A train conducter conducts goes at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph. If he goes under 3 bridges and over 6 hills what did the conductors mother eat for dinner that night. Nothing, after many months of suffering she died from Huntington's disease.

Whats worse than a worm in your apple? A worm in your asshole.

Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

What happened to the seal that walked into the zoo? Well nothing because seals can't walk.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'll choke you with a hose

what do you call a guy that looks exactly like Mario. Frank because thats his name.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Me. You who? Me.

Roses are red Violets are blue I was diagnosed as criminally insane Wanna be my friend?

Why did the chicken cross the road? To cause global mayhem.

why did jenny drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock who's there? not jenny.

What you you call peanut butter on the top of a dog house Peanut butter

A month after the nuclear bombing of Hiroshima, a typhoon hit the city killing another 2,000 people.

Ask me if im a tree! Are you a tree? No

What's funny about anti-jokes? Nothing.

i like it in the mouth

Yo mama is so fat that she has to eat low calorie foods because she wants to lose weight.

Why couldnt dylan make it to mike's birthday party? He was killed instantly in a car crash on the way there.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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