Q; What's the new slogan for the TSA? We handle more junk than EBay.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows, he was a chicken, and was not capable of human speech, so he never told anyone.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot lost control of the plane.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? a fish:)

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're daughter has terminal cancer.

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Whats smells like a banana and is purple? A banana, I lied about the purple thing.

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Why was little Bobby Smith crying on Christmas day? Because the doctor diagnosed him with terminal cancer.

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Why do jews get their foreskin cut off? Because they're jewish.

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Why is cancer a big thing? -It has grown after the diagnoses

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How many shots do you have to take to start feeling light-headed? Ask JFK.

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Timmy needed to use the restroom in class, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I go use the restroom?". The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said, "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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What did the chicken say to the black guy? Nothing, humans and chickens can not communicate.

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Q: Who wants a chick with big breasts? A: Everyone apparently, because chickens are being genetically engineered that way because people are racist about what part of the chicken then want to eat. The white meat or the dark meat. Guess what? Now they can't walk because they are top heavy. And who's fault is that? The people who only eat the white meat.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in every apple.

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Religion.

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Knock Knock there's a doorbell

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, but the very next day, your body rejected the transplant and you died.

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If woman that have big breasts work at Hooters, then do woman with one leg work at Ihop?

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Why did the boy have a rash? He didn't, it was a birthmark.

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What do you call a magic owl? HOODINI only some will get it...

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Why was the muslim surprised? A tyrannosaurus rex bit off his legs.

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http://www.com/

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A: What did the orphan get for christmas? Q: Nothing she doesn't have any parents

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Your mom is so ignorant that she in completely unaware how the premature termination of QE2 in conjunction with a potential US credit downgrade could substantially impact her fixed income portfolios and hinder her ability to retire in the desired time frame.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops