A man goes to the doctor and is told, "you have cancer." He then spends his last days writing a bucket list, but losing his leg in a wood chipper before he could complete a single item on his list

"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Interrupting Owl." "Interrupting Owl who?"

Bruce Forsith's energy and charisma.

If life gives you melons, you're probably dyslexic.

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? -getting raped by 10 very hung men who go balls deep

What's green and apple-y? You're gay.

even a blind squirrel finds a nut every now and then. but has a high probability of getting hit by a car and slowly dying from crushed limbs

What song does the lady camel sing to seduce male camels - my humps my humps my humps my humps How did sergay the camel respond? -we dont know. He died a fatal death involving hippos in hula skirts, and flying guavas

What's gayer than Justin Beiber? The guy getting a blowjob from him! Kelvin Yang.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

What is the difference between a mexican and a bench? One is living, one is not.

Two goldfish are swimming in the ocean. One says to another, "I don't think we will be able to survive in this salty environment".

Whats has 6 wheels and can fly? A dumpster, I lied about the flying.

Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist? He didn't believe in santa.

Three blondes walk into a bar...and have a nice evening, until one of them pulls out a gun and murders everyone at the bar, i think she was schizophrenic or something.

What's large and blue? Probably quite a few things.

What do retards eat for lunch? Grilled Cheese

Q: What do you call the first black guy who swam in the ocean? A: Triangle.

How do you kill a bunch of flies in one swat? Smack an African kid in the face.

Why was 2 afraid of 3? Because 345!!!!!

I am a dwarf and im digging a hole... lol jokes dwarfs are mythological creatures and therefore do not exist

A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

What was the racist kid's least favorite ice cream flavor? Chocolate for an unrelated reason.

Why did the balck man sit at the back of the bus? Because all the other seats were taken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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