How do you find out if your son is ok? Ask him.

Finding TWO worms in your apple.

What do you call a man named Mark? Mark

How many Lepers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? People with leprosy should not be doing general house keeping.

What was wrong with the tomato? Nothing.

What can you use a broken watch for? A compass.

Shiiit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Taken from all sorts of species! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Bengal tiger, kangaroo, African elephant, blue whale too! Shit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-lala-lala!

Last christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, you're body rejected the transplant and you died.

What happens when a women becomes pregnant? She gives birth to a child 9 months later.

what do you order when it's a sunday in nyc during a solar eclipse on a leap year past 12:00 pm? what ever you like

Nowadays, aviation is the most secure means of conveyance in the world, but paragliding is not.

What happened when the blonde girl threw a grenade? The enemy pulled the pin and threw it back

Why did the woman step away from the kitchen? To pick up her paraplegic son, who had fallen.

Yesterday I told a chemistry joke. There was no reaction.

A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

AIDS.

Why didn't the busy San Francisco business man hear his alarm clock ring this morning? A nuclear bomb blast occurred 700 meters from his front door. The estimated blast radius was approximately 100 square miles. Naturally, his alarm clock didn't make it.

tim tebow is a grat quarterback

why did the Cow die....? He didnt!!!!

retard

Why? Why not?

Why couldn't the bartender sell alcoholic beverages? He got fired

HOW DO YOU KILL A BLACK MAN? YOU DONT

Who is John Galt?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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