If I earned a dollar for every time you've said, "I'm too old for this sh*t," I wouldn't have made very much money. You are a giraffe.

So a blonde walks into a wall...

You know the drill, the world is not as black and white as it was before, just because we are not on the same side, does not make us enemies either. As for whatever is going on, I can assure you I had nothing to do with the fall of the first underground, and neither will I make sure whatever you scraped together, large or small falls either, I realize I should have thought this trough some more, but we had little time to act on this one.

what's worse than 24? 6 million.

Q: What has two legs and is bloody? A: half a cat

Charlie Sheen

What do you do when your condom breaks during sexual intercourse? Get AIDS.

why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He had no guts

A dog walks into a bar. It was a bar in Taiwan, so they killed it and ate it.

Welcome to Horsehead! 1. Our servers are derpy right now, do yourself a favor and never come back, oh yes they are gonna be derpy right then too! 2. THIS IS MY WORLD PEOPLE MYYYYY WOOOOOOOORLD!... ...Ps: My world sucks. 3. Antijokes 30000 per day, other stuff, Zero. (30000 by me) 4. You: People better like me because I dont like myself. Me: I like myself FUCK PEOPLE! FUCK YOU! (thats me on horsehead) welcome to die! 5. IRIS... IRIS! WHAT AM I TYPING FOOOOOOOOOOOOR!

Hurricane sandy should have been named hurricane snooki because it ruined the jersey shore

That awkward moment when... Your mom is a guy.

Mind magic for fuck ups: Did you know you can train your dog to magically arrive by saying YOUR name! Just tell it what your name is a lot and voila! Moral: made me laugh, fuck the rest of you XD

Whats funnier than a massacre? Everything.

What is more disappointed the Lake Disappointment? You

What did little Jimmy get for Christmas? Presents because he wasn't poor.

Your mom as so fat that I'm gonna give you the name of this doctor because I really care for you...... And don't want to see you so stressed because she is so fat.

What do you call Mexicans who go to jail? Criminals.

a black man, a jew, a mexican and an irish man walked into a bar and the bartender says: This is joke right??

What's the difference between Asians and buckets? I don't use Asians to scoop water out of the lake.

What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? ProtestS from Anti GM activists.

There's a black guy in a mansion. What's he doing there? He owns it.

roses are red, violets are are blue, I have five fingers, the middle one is for you

Jerry Sandusky walks up to the reception desk at a day care center. What does the lady at the desk say? Nothing, she promptly gives Mr. Sandusky his son and they leave.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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