What did the baseball coach say to his son? Nothing. He was dead.

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Q: Why was the little girl not allowed to watch the pirate film? A: Due to the violent scenes and coarse language, her parents decided it was inappropriate.

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Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Why did the homosexual cross the road without looking both ways? He was blind......

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I have suicidal thoughts

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Q. Why did the little boy fall off the swing? A. Because he has no arms.

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What do you call a Mexican that doesn't have a lawn mower? An honest working induvidual that just so happens to live in the city and does not own a lawn mower

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what do you call a black man who beats his wife, doesnt have a job and has a ton of kids? whatever his name is.

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Why did Chuck Norris's calendar go from March 31st to April 2nd? There was a misprint

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Why did the muslim cross the road? To get to the other Saiid.

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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How did Darth Vader know what Luke Skywalker got for Christmas? He's his dad. He bought the presents.

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Why was Timmy late for class? He got hit by a bus. Why was Jimmy late for class? He saw Timmy lying in the middle of the street, went out to help and got hit by another bus.

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Why did the editor lose his job at a poetry magazine? Because he's worthless.

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Whats the similarity between a rabbit and a grape? There both purple, except for the rabbit.

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Two kids walk into a bar and get arrested for underage drinking.

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What do you call a black man with a Ph.D? Doctor.

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Q-how many dead babies does it take to paint your geradge door? A-one if you throw it hard enough

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Hi. P.S: You have aids. P.P.S: Purple penis pumpernickel pie puppets.

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Why wasn't Steve paying attention in class? Because he was dead.

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What does a black guy get for Christmas? your bike.

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Why do Jews fast for Yom Kippur? It's part of their tradition.

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How do you minimize the likelihood of theft? Take the derivative.

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what did lois call peter when she first saw him? i dont dont know do you?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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