How do you make a mime cry? Hit him with an axe

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TWO ROADS DIVERGED IN A WOOD

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Knock Knock *opens the door*

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It's the police sir. There's been an accident.

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Why didn't little Billy's parents get him the new toy he wanted? Little Billy's parents are dead.

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Whats worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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When you have read this, you've already read it.

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What happened to thepeanut who went to NYC? He was assulted

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Lol Nerochan, that was like totally awesome!

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Roses are red Violets are blue You just lost the game UMAD Bro?

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How do you get a clown off of your property? You ask him politely to get off and if he doesn't, you should contact the authorities immediately.

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Why don't women wear watches? In the technological age we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

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How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them Why did Jane fall off the swing She has no arms Why did Jack drop his ice cream cone He got hit by a bus Did you know that if you pretend to eat salt you can actualy taste it Do this in public. Why was 6 afraid of 7 Numbers can't think This is the original anti joke A man walked into a bar he is an alcoholic and is distroying his family. Fin a penny pick it up and all the day you will have good luck Until you get hit with a car door. A man is SCUBA diving when he is almost out of air so he takes one breath an holds it to the surface The trip is so long that his lungs explode do to a change in pressure so he died.

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What did Sally want for Christmas? Nothing, she is Jewish.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He felt like crossing roads that day.

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So a man walks into a bar, right?

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This anti-joke below is hilarious.

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Why did the boy get hit by a wrecking ball? Because he picked up an upside down penny.

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Why was the uneducated black guy raped? To make this joke more risky and therefore funnier.

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What do you call a black man on steroids? Strong.

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Why was 9 afraid of 10 because 10 was a registered sex offender

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If the camel has seven toes and the armadillo has thirteen, why does your mom pleasure herself to a picture of George Clooney ?

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What's the difference between Tom and Jerry? One is a cat, and the other is a mouse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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