Why did the chicken cross the road? Most likely for no discernible reason as chickens are animals with poor reasoning skills.

What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing because their both fruits.

A man finds a lamp in the desert. He picks it up and dusts it off. The lamp becomes cleaner.

What is yellow, has wheels, and lays on it's back? A school bus after a traffic accident

4 hours later.

What is blue, around 30 cm long and makes women cry? Crib death!

what did the boy with no arms get for christmas? A pair of robtic arms and now he has super stregth so he fuk up any body who said he would get cancer.

it's easy to take part, just type your text below!

What did the muffin say to the cup cake? nothing, muffins can't talk, and cup cakes can't hear.

There is big difference between helping your Uncle Jack off a horse And helping your uncle jack off a horse

fridge

Why couldn't the drunken man walk in a straight line? Because someone shot him in the face.

why did the little girl scream?She was afraid of clowns and hated small cars running around a tent

A month after the nuclear bombing of Hiroshima, a typhoon hit the city killing another 2,000 people.

What's a black man's favorite fruit? Clementines.

How did the conductor survive the Electric Chair? - He was a bad conducter

Why couldn't the black man swim? He has no legs.

what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? Well, a pizza is edible object provided for human consumption, and a jew is a holy human being believing in the prophet abraham.

Yo mama's so fat that she has a heart condition.

Why did Christopher Columbus sail to America? Because sailing was faster than swimming.

Malcolm Johnson from Zenith windows, I was wondering if I could speak to you for a while about some fantastic offers which we currently have on double glazed windows....

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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