whats long and hard and full of seamen a penis

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What's black and doesn't work? My blackberry

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How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its neck.

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Q-Whos the best server at Sonic? A-Kevin !

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What do u call a woman geometry teacher. Santains wife.

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Whats black, white, and Asian all at the same time? A panda

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why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

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What do you do when your dish washer breaks? divorce her.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia And so do I..

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A car walks into a bar.

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Why the hell does my sister shower in a swimsuit every time? Its not as if anyone is looking! ALRIGHT! ONCE ALRIGHT? ONLY ONCE! But then she hears the sound of my zipper ONCE and the shit hits the fan! Which is weird, yeah suuure she hears it when I pull it up, but when I pull it down and stroke it and moan? Nada!

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the only thing funny about this website is the fact ciaran hawkins is in love with it

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How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? It is highly unlikely one would have a supply of dead babies large enough to answer this question.

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Hey, wanna here a dirty joke? A pig fell in mud.

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One scientist is talking to another scientist. One say "what's the matter?" The other replies "my family is dead"

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What's the difference between an alligator and an argyle sweater? There are far too many conceivable differences between the two objects to be able to give an actual definite variance between them.

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Q: Why did the baby cross the road? A: Because it was stapled to the chicken.

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? It's Jeff. Hi there Jeff, come in, the doors open.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? Neither has he.

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Why did the woman fall off her bike?? Because someone threw a fridge at her!!!!!!

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What happens when your school teacher gives you homework over the break? You give your teacher homework too!

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What do you get when you cross a rusty nail and a foot? Tetanus

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Your mum is so fat, she is likely to do die before my mum.

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how do you save a baby from drowning? Take your foot off the back of its head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops