Why did Captain Obvious crossed the road? Because that's the name of the chicken

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How did poor Miss Suzy get her poor little baby to stop crying? She cut off its head, burned its body, and sacrificed its ashes in a bizarre Satanic ritual that involved having sex with a heifer. (Miss Suzy was a Satanist priestess.)

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How do you kill a vampire? You can't because vampires aren't real.

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- On the cliff edge are standing three people: an Asian, Jewish and black man. Who's going to fall first? - Who's going to care about this?

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your mom is so stupid she got raped

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A man walks into a bar. He drinks.

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How do you milk a cow? Pull on its' utters.

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What do you call people in a plane crash? Whatever, i wasn't on the plane.

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Q.what has big ears? A.your vagina.

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Knock Knock Whos there? Your mom My mom died three years ago, please go away while i cry.

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Regarding the "I will violate you, your children and your parent if you thumb me red" comment belo. I had a green thumb, I know because I gave it to myself because I am awesome... Now I got none... I person that this this, I cannot wait to X-mas where I will be violating them all, tell them, and as thus remind you that this was their Christmas present from you... Your friendly r*pist neighborhood Moral Man: Yes, I am your neigbor... I cant wait for slot number 24 on my christmas calendar... There is a picture of you and your family... Yummy!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cow moo

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"I know it. I can feel it in my nuggets." -Chicken Joe

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman went to the top of the Empire State building to have a penis measuring contest. The Irishman had the longest penis.

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What do you call an Islamic man fling a plane? A very frightened passenger who took over flying the plane when the pilot collapsed due to a heart attack

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A man walks into a bar, muttering to himself. People stare at him because his severe Schizophrenia makes him stand out in social situations.

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you got Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, and Reese Witherspoon. Which do you think is more succesful

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How do you throw a party in space? You planet!

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What do you call a dear with no eyes? A victim of animal cruelty.

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What was the best part of the holocaust? A: none of it, it was a terrible event in history and hopefully is never repeated

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Why do girls like nikki minaj? Because she raps good. -Avery Vartanian

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Whats the differents between a red farrari and a dead baby? I dont have a red farrari in my garage;)

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Hook. Hook who? Who are you Hooking Your Horns to?

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Knock Knock Who's there? no one, you've got Psycosis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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