A Jewish man gets on a train. He sits down and a hour and a half later he is dropped of at his proper destination.

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I'm going as the joker for halloween

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A police officer asks a witness of a murder what he witnessed. The man replies "A murder"

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There was a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette on an island. This island is called England, and this situation tends to happen a lot.

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If I have 12 backpacks and Jimmy has 91 pancakes, then how many marshmallows can cover the roof of this building? Purple. Because Aliens don't wear hats.

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what ate all the ants in the hill? an anteater

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feminine literature

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Austin is gay. He goes to River Road. And is a sophomore.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Bob Hi bob, come inside. And next time just use the doorbell

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What do you do if you can't go to the Wednesday Night Market on Wednesday? You go on Thursday

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You know what happens when there's an awkward silence... Everyone feels a little bit uncomfortable for a brief moment in time.

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no really what are ur names?

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A: Hi I am a Mormon B: I know I'm one of your wifes

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what is the difference between my pubes and my actualy hair on my head.... my pubes didnt fall off when i went trough chemo

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Bill: Heydidyouknowlosersaywhat Donny: What? Bill: Loser

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on the wall? Wally.

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I was gonna tell a gay joke Butt fuck it.

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A racist walks into a bar. Nasty accident you had there mate. You should be more careful next time.

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Once upon a time, there were a lot of Jews......

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Whats worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Having a Hippo give you head.

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Roses are red violates are blue, matty is gay, sebby is too

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What does it mean when you have big shoes? Either you were genetically born with big feet, or you are wearing sheos that are too big for you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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