A bartender walks up to a church and a synagogue

Do you work at subway? Because I often enjoy eating there and i think the food is pretty good. I do not however eat there everyday because i might get overweight and get a eating disorder.

Why were there bones on the moon? The cow diden't make it.

What do you call a black man and an Asian at a school? Two hard-working, dedicated teachers.

The latter three thousand pages of this website.

Why did the chicken cross the roard? There were no cars in the immediate vacinity and the chicken therefore came to a logical conclusion that it was a rational theorem on which crossing the road could be based.

Why was young Ferdinand sad? He had a very rough day. In the morning he woke up. To find a man in his room, and then the man raped him. Then, Ferdinand found out that his whole family was killed by an angry rat. Then, he realized his grandma took away all his Christmas presents and ate them. Then, the angry rat showed up and brutally murdered Ferdinand and ate him. The rat then burped up Ferdinand and his family's bones, and on Ferdinand's bone there was something wrong, indicating that Ferdinand had cancer and would've died the next day anyway. The rat then got cancer from Ferdinand, and it died. That is why Ferdinand was sad.

How many babies does it take it to feed a grown man? It depends on the size of the man, how hungry he is and how big the babies are.

A black man walks into a bank with a gun and askes where the safe is then procedes to shoots 3 white men inside of it. Everyone thanks him for stopping the armed bank robbers and he lives out the rest of his life in happiness for he is a hardworking cop and risks his life to save others.

Why did the man jump out of the plane? Because the plane was losing fuel fast so he grabbed a parachute and went for it and realized that was the only one left so everyone died a horrible death.

Question :how many does an episode of Power Rangers show the power rangers face answer I'm not that big with power rangers.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To pick up the carcass of its road-killed younger brother and weep.

The morning of her 16th birthday, April's parents presented her with a young racehorse named Bolt. Bolt was energetic and strong the first two days, easily trotting around their 4 acre estate, but the following morning, when April went out to bring Bolt his breakfast, she found him leaning on his stable, head down, slowly rolling side to side. Upon seeing her newfound friend in distress, she promptly asked, "Are you okay Bolt? Why the long face?" Soon after, April realized that she had made a clever pun and grinned childishly. April's glory was short lived however, when Bolt suddenly collapsed due to an aortic aneurysm. Having spent most of their retirement on this racehorse, April's parents sold the ranch and moved into a retirement home, disgracing their daughter for not taking care of their steed. April, believing herself to be the culprit for Bolt's death, later committed suicide.

Why didn't bob like night clubs? He was epileptic

A drunken man grabbed a gun and shot his entire family to death. Luckily, a even drunker man had shot them moments before, so it really only served to ruin the perfectly good wall behind them with bullet holes.

How do you kill a domb blond? Shoot her in the head.

Knock Knock Who’s there? Your son Your son who? Your son who’s sick of having a paranoid mother who won’t just open the door!

Whats gay, has a nice ass, and can such a mad dick? Everyone at LNS, including me, Glenn. Just kidding I like bitches.

What do you get when you shoot 3 cute kittens that have just walked into the house? 3 dead kittens

yo mama is so fat she has more body mass than a skinny person

Why did the world end? Because of Jim Layhey's whispering winds of shit.

why did the baby have a hole in its head? it was shot

What has 2 legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog

Nero, I have 30 million dollars left, lets split them and leave ground zero behind us, I know it would make me happy to share them with you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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